Anal Sex - God's Loophole?

[-Matt-]

Actually the anal loophole isn't even necessary, at least not in Christianity.

See you can simply do whatever you want to do all your life then, before you die, simply ask God for forgiveness and accept Jesus as your lord and savior. BOOM, you're good!

This loophole is risky - if you are blessed enough to be given a quick death, you will be damned for not having the time to pray yourself into heaven.

To help mitigate this risk, I suggest writing a small script that generates a prayer and emails it to God. Schedule a cron to run it daily. You are now guaranteed to go to heaven.

*Note: I'm not responsible if you follow this advice, get flagged by God as spam, and sent to hell. Make sure he opted-in, and don't put the words "penis enlargement" in the title of your prayers - even if that is the main point of your prayer.

 

[dmnEPC]

This loophole is risky - if you are blessed enough to be given a quick death, you will be damned for not having the time to pray yourself into heaven.

To help mitigate this risk, I suggest writing a small script that generates a prayer and emails it to God. Schedule a cron to run it daily. You are now guaranteed to go to heaven.

*Note: I'm not responsible if you follow this advice, get flagged by God as spam, and sent to hell. Make sure he opted-in, and don't put the words "penis enlargement" in the title of your prayers - even if that is the main point of your prayer.

+rep

Unfortuantly can only rep once per post

 

[galacon]

The only problem I have now is using that pesky drawstring for a sphincter.