How to destroy asshats named Caleb...

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crossfittn

crossfittn

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Feb 4, 2007
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Basically, almost every Caleb I've been exposed to in life has made me want to grab his head and grind his face into a tree. Mostly.

Recently I've been getting very fit and making progress faster than all the Calebs at my gym. I was introduced to a few techniques by my friend who is a personal trainer who's into short high intensity workouts.

So I wrote up this quick guide to help you experience the same. It's a great way to get fit without spending more than 15-20 minutes 3-5 days a week.

Click here to read the article on my blog. OH and yep.. It's on my main site so it's kindof... irrelevant to you guys - sorry about that.

Anyway, let me know what you think about it, and if you have any questions!
 


Dave you're definitely not the first one who has responded to one of my posts saying "WTF??"

But seriously if you want to get fit take a look at Crossfit.com (no affiliation here... although I would love to start a crossfit meetup in TN)

If anyone else here is like me and spends almost all day in front of the computer, I figure this might help out.
 
Did a lot of those exercises or variations of them while I was in the service. Most of it is good stuff. Just remember (especially if you are a beginner) to start slow and stop if you feel *real* pain. There's no shame in building up steadily.
 
JUICING? Hell no.. I hate those guys.

Nice, Chucktown! It is really fun and my times are getting better. Recently my friend blew me a away with this though:

It took him 15 minutes to do:

21 Swings (55)
21 Pull-ups
21 Swings (55)
21 Burpees
21 Swings (55)
21 Box Jumps
21 Swings (55)
21 Wall Ball
21 Swings (55)
21 Sumo Deadlift High Pull (32kg/24kg)
21 Swings (55/35)

I'm going to try it this weekend. My time is going to be at least 20 minutes, I bet.
 
John said:
Your not a man if you work out and don't juice.
Click to expand...

Haha. Well I guess I should be glad this isn't an exercise/bodybuilding forum.

Juice or don't juice. I don't care. Just know what you're getting into the first time you stick that needle in your ass cheek.
 
John, all I have to say to you is:

The obliterated mollusk among the corncob pipes, on top of a squirrel homebase with a well-spoken man....

...is not a complete sentence.
 
arms-thumb.jpg

Yeah baby, i can't even wipe my own ass, but i am HUGE!


(sidenote.....this dude's pic was NOT photoshopped. i saw a special on this freak on either the discovery or the learning channel. He became obsessed with having the largest arms on the planet and became a juice dealer to get hold of every drug that could help him get that)
 
CrossFit is alright for athletic performance if you need the commercialized stimulation. If you are a skinny bastard and want to get buff, the Zone diet and a lot of the CrossFit methods are not going to be the most effective way to go (PM me if you want a few pointers/good sources of information).

And don't buy any fucking pills or injections. Just a good multi vitamin (which you should have anyways) and a few other supplements. Do your research on bodybuilding sites.

90%+ of people who fail at their exercise program don't have a proper diet.
 
Are you guys trying to say that being a skinny bastard is something to be ashamed of?!

Here's my issue..

I am tall and thin, a smoker, and I don't have a very solid diet. I'm also on Adderall, so working out during those hours is NOT something I can do. I can also eat almost any type of food, and a shitload of it, and never gain an ounce, and sometimes I'll just lose it doing absolutely nothing. So you tell me, aside for the "you should stop smoking" crap, what would you recommend I do to start gaining muscle and mass with my type of metabolism and situation?

Give me a diet plan and workout routine. I do have a home gym with pretty much every type of machine and weight training.

Show me how to get to a normal weight/size and I'll show you how to make money.
 
yea i am in your boat. i sit on my ass all day, eat calorie-rich food all the time and cant gain any weight. fuck.
 
Jon said:
Are you guys trying to say that being a skinny bastard is something to be ashamed of?!

Here's my issue..

I am tall and thin, a smoker, and I don't have a very solid diet. I'm also on Adderall, so working out during those hours is NOT something I can do. I can also eat almost any type of food, and a shitload of it, and never gain an ounce, and sometimes I'll just lose it doing absolutely nothing. So you tell me, aside for the "you should stop smoking" crap, what would you recommend I do to start gaining muscle and mass with my type of metabolism and situation?

Give me a diet plan and workout routine. I do have a home gym with pretty much every type of machine and weight training.

Show me how to get to a normal weight/size and I'll show you how to make money.
Click to expand...

Except for the Addrall I'm exactly the same, Tall and skinny, I can eat anything and never gain a pound, I smoke, and I can loose weight by doing very little, I've tried working out every single day for well over a year and still don't build up muscle mass.

I weigh 130 pounds right now and I'd be happy to be at 160 minimum but nothing I do helps and there are lots like me and Jon so if you could solve this problem you could make some good money.

Otherwise I don't really feel I need to change because women like big muscled guy's, yeah sure I've lost out on some pussy because of it but you know what I could care less, I'm fucking smarter then hell and I hang out in any fucking crowd I want, anywhere from nerds to complete drug dealers and my personality is one of a kind.

I'd much rather be original and one of a kind then worry about looking a certain way, fuck it, most women think I'm cute, good enough, fuck everyone else who cannot accept me.

Ok a bit off topic here but you get the point.
 
Losing or gaining weight is all about calories. If you want to lose weight, you consume less calories than you burn throughout the day. You want to gain weight then consume more calories than you burn throughout the day. It's as simple as that. 3500 calories = 1 lb. If you're overeating by 500 cals a day, then you should gain a pound a week.

The problem with skinny or fat bastards who complain about "I can't lose weight!" OR "I can't gain a pound!" is because you're not paying attention to what you're eating. If you actually counted everything you consumed...you would eventually be able to pinpoint your problem. As a fat bastard who "can't lose weight" I know its because of what I eat. If I actually tracked what what I was eating and burning throughout the day, I'd easily be able to predict where I'm going to be tomorrow.

Losing or gaining weight is 70% diet. The rest is your lifestyle (how often you exercise, what you do, job, etc.). Lay a foundation and the rest will come.

Better Body Journal » Blog Archive » Laying the Foundation - Part 1

I present you skinny bastards with this. Its from my favorite weightlifting website out there. It goes in depth about pretty much what I just talked about. Testosterone Nation - The Skinny Bastard Diet
 
poolemit said:
thanks a lot that skinny bastard diet article is awesome. too bad i'm not disciplined for shit
Click to expand...

I got the same problem losing weight. It's simple and obvious. Just like successful online marketers preach testing, tracking, and everything else to newbies...most of them don't listen because it sounds too easy or think results are related to something else.
 
I'm just like you Jon, minus the pills and cigs. I gave up on trying to gain bulk. I'm just lifting to get stronger. Just be consistent, and if you're getting stronger, the muscle and size should come with it. Of course you won't look like that fucker at the top of the screen, but you'll notice that your muscles are fuller and hell you might even get bigger.
 
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