I am the very model of a modern web search marketer,
My English is on par with a mute Mexican gardener,
I know the Kings of Wickedfire and quote the lulz historical,
From "Did Not Read" to Batman memes, in order categorical,
I'm not at all acquianted with the matters mathematical,
Hire VA's to do equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About conversion theorum I'm teeming with a lot of news,
From ebooks I have saved to disk from so many wafo gurus.
I'm not too bad with scrapebox but I get confused by xrumer,
My biggest source of income comes from tricking stupid googlers.
In short, I have less skills than a blind and handless carpenter,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
I know my web search history from Infoseek to WebCrawler,
And when my client's ranks go down I am an expert consoler,
I quote all the statistics of my industry in parrot form,
I may not understand them but I do it cuz it is the norm,
My browser's tabs are filled with stupid forum threads and homo porn,
Because I've been a gay webmaster since the day that I was born,
I brush off daily tasks claiming my time is too valuable,
But the way I spend my time, most would find is simply laughable.
I fuck up all the time, my tasks are rarely done with any care,
If it weren't for plugins I would still be sponging off welfare,
In short, I have less skills than a blind and handless carpenter,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
I barely know the meaning of "diversity" or "natural",
I make up shit upon the spot and claim that it is factual,
My clients think I am a team all working in the same city,
They think their links are all whitehat, but really they are all shitty,
I don't use analytics, I advise against webmaster tools,
I don't want clients finding out that I am breaking all the rules,
My keyword research sucks and with OnPage I am a total clutz,
But when my sites don't rank I make a forum thread and blame Matt Cutts.
But still I give advice and yes I do so with such confidence,
I'll fake it til I make it and ignore potential consequence,
Now I'll go back to spamming aff links for dick hardeners,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
My English is on par with a mute Mexican gardener,
I know the Kings of Wickedfire and quote the lulz historical,
From "Did Not Read" to Batman memes, in order categorical,
I'm not at all acquianted with the matters mathematical,
Hire VA's to do equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About conversion theorum I'm teeming with a lot of news,
From ebooks I have saved to disk from so many wafo gurus.
I'm not too bad with scrapebox but I get confused by xrumer,
My biggest source of income comes from tricking stupid googlers.
In short, I have less skills than a blind and handless carpenter,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
I know my web search history from Infoseek to WebCrawler,
And when my client's ranks go down I am an expert consoler,
I quote all the statistics of my industry in parrot form,
I may not understand them but I do it cuz it is the norm,
My browser's tabs are filled with stupid forum threads and homo porn,
Because I've been a gay webmaster since the day that I was born,
I brush off daily tasks claiming my time is too valuable,
But the way I spend my time, most would find is simply laughable.
I fuck up all the time, my tasks are rarely done with any care,
If it weren't for plugins I would still be sponging off welfare,
In short, I have less skills than a blind and handless carpenter,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
I barely know the meaning of "diversity" or "natural",
I make up shit upon the spot and claim that it is factual,
My clients think I am a team all working in the same city,
They think their links are all whitehat, but really they are all shitty,
I don't use analytics, I advise against webmaster tools,
I don't want clients finding out that I am breaking all the rules,
My keyword research sucks and with OnPage I am a total clutz,
But when my sites don't rank I make a forum thread and blame Matt Cutts.
But still I give advice and yes I do so with such confidence,
I'll fake it til I make it and ignore potential consequence,
Now I'll go back to spamming aff links for dick hardeners,
I am the very model of a modern web search marketer.
