Questions for Wickedfire Parents

loyolabenson

loyolabenson

make monies
May 17, 2007
1,469
22
0
Did your productivity rise,fall or stay the same after your first born?


On one hand I can see potential for rising. From just reading topics here, a lot of you(on this forum) rise when responsibility/pressure rises.

on the other hand,

You may lose time, so that may be a loss in productivity.



question 2.

This is for the strictly the self-employed and spends majority of time at home.

What was your experience of staying at home with your child all day? Do you have a better bond than your peers do with their children?


Thanks bros
 


Q1:
It didn't seem to directly effect the amount I worked. Before the baby, I dicked around a lot more.. Now with the baby, I use my time more wisely and I'm still able to work the same.. I'm still not great in the work ethic department, not as great as I could be.

Q2:
I don't know, don't have too many friends with children. My bond with her IS good though.. My wife's friends have babies and a couple of them don't like going to their dad as much as their mom, since mom is around a lot more.

Ultimately, if you're breaking your ass right now to make ends meet with no time required (before a child), it'll be tougher since you'll have less time; though the case could be made to the mother/wife that you can't be disturbed frequently.
 
  • Like
Reactions: loyolabenson
dreamache said:
Q1:
It didn't seem to directly effect the amount I worked. Before the baby, I dicked around a lot more.. Now with the baby, I use my time more wisely and I'm still able to work the same.. I'm still not great in the work ethic department, not as great as I could be.

Q2:
I don't know, don't have too many friends with children. My bond with her IS good though.. My wife's friends have babies and a couple of them don't like going to their dad as much as their mom, since mom is around a lot more.

Ultimately, if you're breaking your ass right now to make ends meet with no time required (before a child), it'll be tougher since you'll have less time; though the case could be made to the mother/wife that you can't be disturbed frequently.
Click to expand...


thanks man, gonna rep you 2mrw. reps go fast these days. too much good shit at wf.

some good advice here.
 
loyolabenson said:
Did your productivity rise,fall or stay the same after your first born?
Click to expand...
Rose. I had no more excuses to dick around. I have an extra mouth to feed, so I work harder.

loyolabenson said:
question 2.
This is for the strictly the self-employed and spends majority of time at home.

What was your experience of staying at home with your child all day? Do you have a better bond than your peers do with their children?
Click to expand...

No. If anything, it's worse because you are "there" in person, but not "present" - You can't explain to a 2 year old, "Daddy is at home but can't pay attention to you because he's working."

I prefer leaving home to work, since there's a physical separation between me at home with my wife and son, and me away at work.
 
I've got 4 kids (from 13 to 5 now). The biggest change it had for me was the amount of risk I was willing to take.

Prior to kids I'd take every dime I had and throw it at an idea.

Can't do that now. I have to budget, make sure college and crap is ready, the health insurance, life insurance, etc... is all paid for.

Time wise - it is tough. My 5 year old has been bugging me all day (with mom downstairs) to play with her. I tend to take my breaks and play with her in little bursts all day. We take the dog for a walk, play soccer for a few minutes, eat a snack together, etc...

That doesn't count the 34 times she interrupted me to just tell me something, ask me something, or find a reason to break my concentration.

But let me tell you - I am fierce productive from about 5 minutes from now till I pass out. It's the only quiet time I get.
 
When my daughter was born I had just been laid off and spent the first 3 months of her life with her 24/7.. When she was 1 I was back in college getting a 5 year architecture degree in 4 years and working 40+ hours a week "delivering pizza" (really) while my wife worked on her Air Force career..

When she was 7 I retired and home schooled her for 4 years and worked on my own business part time.. I was a 4H mom for 10 years (11 if you add in the year we had my niece with us)

The trend continues like that until she graduated high school a year early and went off to college..

Unfortunately I didn't learn fast enough that I was working too much.. If at all possible I'd rather have pushed my power earning years either earlier or later in life so that I can spend more time with my kid while she was home and growing up..

Having my kid home all day while home schooling was great.. I spent the day with her.. Evening with the family, then worked at night when they slept.. For about 8 years I lived on about 4 hours of sleep a night.. Maybe that's why I feel like I'm 60 years old now.. I tried working while she was awake, but as stmadeveloper said, its nearly impossible..
 
Feydakin said:
For about 8 years I lived on about 4 hours of sleep a night.. Maybe that's why I feel like I'm 60 years old now..
Click to expand...

Major props man, that's nuts..

Not to make assumptions, but if you feel you're 60.. have you tried workin out hardcore / eating right? I know it can make a world of difference for those who've been sedentary.
 
dreamache said:
Major props man, that's nuts..

Not to make assumptions, but if you feel you're 60.. have you tried workin out hardcore / eating right? I know it can make a world of difference for those who've been sedentary.
Click to expand...

Yup, when we were stationed in New Mexico (Kirtland AFB) I worked out with the Air Force Search and Rescue team every day.. I'm slowly getting back in to shape, but find sitting at the computer less and less fun every week.. Couple more web sites to build out and then I can go back to being semi-retired.. ;)
 
1. I get a little less done now than before the baby was born. My wife and I both work from home and we split up the time watching the baby so the other can get some work done. When she's napping, I'm the most productive guy in the world.

2. She's only 16 months, but I can't imagine working a job where I was away all day and only got to spend time with her for a couple hours in the evening. We have so much fun playing and hanging out during the day. Huge perk of working from home.

I have two friends who are stay at home Dad's, so they spend all day with their kids too. Only difference between me and them is I'm trying to run a business and help care for my child. Somehow they manage to just let their wives work and still pay the bills. Guess I'm doing it wrong.
 
loyolabenson said:
Did your productivity rise,fall or stay the same after your first born?
Click to expand...

Your productivity must be on the raise or you will get lost. You need to learn how to work in the short period of times.

If you stay with kid at home then it is difficult to get any work done. Depends of course how old is the baby. At some point you will get distracted every 5 minutes with your kid presenting you with a rare-shaped poo or weird events at home such as fly on the window or a little red spot on the carpet.

Personally I don't even try to switch on computer when staying with my kid (apart maybe from checking statistic or some other simple stuff). It's pointless. None of the things is done properly when you try to do both.
Even if your kid goes away and play itself you feel guilty and can't focus. Personally I play with a kid, we go for a walks, I try to learn her some father-stuff. In the end of the day I know I didn't move forward with AM but at least I got satisfaction I watch my kid growing and that I don't miss a thing.

At some point of life you will get you monies (soon or later) but you can witness your kid growing only once.
 
  • Like
Reactions: loyolabenson
I would have to say that productivity increases simply due to the lack of sleep in the initial stages of having a newborn.

Considering I have four of em' I haven't slept much in the last 15 years. As a result I very rarely get anymore than 4-5 hours a night anymore...I'm just not used to sleeping for longer than that. If I sleep more than that I wake up feeling tired...go figure!?

Since I am doing a double degree at University and trying to get this whole "make money online" shit to work for me, less sleep works for me.
 
I had my first son just over 20 months ago.. happy times!

Been working from home for the past 4 years (3 in Lanzarote 1 in UK) and to start with it was hard work. Night feeds and sleepless nights were hard work when trying to get up at a sensible time to start working but lucky enough that my son started sleeping through the night quite quickly.

He also 'always' slept in his own room (from coming out of the hospital) which I think made a big difference.

Its hard work and you wont get as much work done but you soon change and adapt to working when the little one goes for a sleep.

I would say I have a really good bond with my son, he see's me every day so I've been involved with everything (good and bad) with him from birth which is something a hell of a lot of parents can't do.. so a big upside of working from home.

Best bet is to ensure you earn enough that your partner does not have to work.. without my wife being a stay at home mother I would get no work done :)
 
For the first 6 months, it totally fucked it because of sleep deprivation.

However after she started sleeping - it rose dramatically. I now have hard limits on my time, which means I have to be more focussed.

Also - much better bond. I tend to spend mornings playing with her and going out, then working in PM and evening after she is in bed. Means she's much closer to me than other kids I know are to their fathers. She's also very independent - happy to sit on my lap and watch me type or on the phone, or if she gets bored she'll go into the garden and find some slugs to eat or something.

I think we're lucky there though - other parents say their toddlers are a nightmare when it comes to demanding attention. It may be to do with the fact I carry her constantly in a sling when we're out, so she gets all the contact she needs then.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom