Rise in Social Media, Rise in Isolation?

turbolapp

turbolapp

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Aug 10, 2007
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The following are some excerpts of a conversation I was having with another IM. It's something I've been concerned about for a while. Yesterday just brought it to surface:

The internet connects us in only the most superficial of ways. Skype, Twitter and Facebook are great examples of this. You are only who you want to be perceived as being.

The irony is that we've never been so connected in human history and yet, we've never been so isolated as we are today.

Face to face relationships are disarming, we've evolved as a species to be able to comb physical cues for what people are really saying. But we are not yet so evolved as to be able to decode words the same way. And thus, in our ever more connected world, we can talk more without having to say anything at all. There is no better place to hide then on the internet, and because of it's implicit self-reliance and lack of structure, affiliate marketing tends to draw heavily from the well of working-world outcasts- dropouts, convicts, and people just incapable of working for the man for one reason or another. Loners abound in our industry, and I always thought it odd that a bunch of loners could be so social with one another on forums, instant messaging and social media- but we can't escape the world we slip back into when we close the laptop at the end of the day.

...And if this is my story, I wonder how many other people are out there like this? A persona entirely different from who they make themselves out to be, if you could just scratch the surface? Like you. Or Brandon. Or anyone we talk to on the internet at all.

There's a real danger here. People think we're all so connected and that we are progressing as a species and while we are, on a technical level, we're certainly regressing at an emotional one. Humans are a social animal, we need touch and proximity to go along with our conversations and connections.
 
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I'll +1 what Lauren said.

The the past two years, I have been living between 4 or so different locations during the week, rarely at one place for more than 1-2 days. So, physical interactions with friends has been really scarce. I started noticing the inability to get out my train of thought as easily as I use to when verbally debating people after the first few months of it when I did hang out with friends or was in class. I can see why people get recluse, because it's really embarrassing to lose your train of thought.

I know that my situation isn't the norm with many in the Industry though, so it's often a life choice that people can get out of.

I know that now that I'm done with my graduate program I'm making a point to get up at 5am and run, shed the 40-45lbs I put on due to a crazy schedule, and make time for old friends. There's often nothing stopping people from doing the same.


This point (while I understand it when you're a teenager) I don't quite get from more mature people:
turbolapp said:
...And if this is my story, I wonder how many other people are out there like this? A persona entirely different from who they make themselves out to be, if you could just scratch the surface? Like you. Or Brandon. Or anyone we talk to on the internet at all.
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I talk just like I write on the Internet, and don't say anything that I wouldn't face-to-face. I have always assumed that other adults did as well.

Aside from trolling people, what's really the point in trying to be someone different on a forum? If you're roleplaying in a game, cool, I get that. This is a social forum for business discussion, there's no point in trying to be someone you aren't in real life.
 
The internet connects us in only the most superficial of ways. Skype, Twitter and Facebook are great examples of this. You are only who you want to be perceived as being.
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I consider the advent of social media and social sites as the single most backward step in the evolution of human relationships that has ever been spawned. It, as an ideal, is an oxymoron to the nth degree. People are becoming less social. Convenience is breeding it's spread when convenience should be the last prerequisite for social interaction.

At the core of this is is people wanting contact anyway they can get it but without the the problem of being yourself that is required in a true human interaction.

People will now skype, message people on various platforms (facebook, aim, and others) instead of traveling three or four blocks down the road to actually speak with someone face to face.

I honestly believe that it is retarding social growth and personal interaction worldwide. It also brings the worst out in us. It is so easy to be petty and shallow when hiding behind a screen.

I understand where you are coming from and I feel bad for you that you are feeling the way you are at the moment; but I don't think what you have written is wrong at all.

Social media socially disconnects us more and more everyday.

Btw...I am pretty much of this opinion in the real world as well. I quite often get into arguments over it.

Personally I would rather interact face to face with people if it all possible.
 
learningcurve said:
I consider the advent of social media and social sites as the single most backward step in the evolution of human relationships that has ever been spawned. It, as an ideal, is an oxymoron to the nth degree. People are becoming less social. Convenience is breeding it's spread when convenience should be the last prerequisite for social interaction.

At the core of this is is people wanting contact anyway they can get it but without the the problem of being yourself that is required in a true human interaction.

People will now skype, message people on various platforms (facebook, aim, and others) instead of traveling three or four blocks down the road to actually speak with someone face to face.

I honestly believe that it is retarding social growth and personal interaction worldwide. It also brings the worst out in us. It is so easy to be petty and shallow when hiding behind a screen.

I understand where you are coming from and I feel bad for you that you are feeling the way you are at the moment; but I don't think what you have written is wrong at all.

Social media socially disconnects us more and more everyday.

Btw...I am pretty much of this opinion in the real world as well. I quite often get into arguments over it.

Personally I would rather interact face to face with people if it all possible.
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Man, I have a feeling that you are not new to wickedfire.
 
I believe that the bottom line here is that the net has made us all far lazier.

I cannot imagine picking up a damn corded phone anymore to talk to someone. Just the idea of it reminds me of black & white movies.... Yet 15 years ago I used a few of them daily.

Of course our social skills are going to regress. I don't know which made mine regress more though; depending on the net to communicate, or quitting my J.O.B. way back when and working from home. -Certainly they go hand in hand and amplify the effect more than the sum of their parts.

What scares me though is the thought of kids today NOT KNOWING how social a creature that we once were. Sure they see it in movies but that's not as interesting to them, so it's like a history lesson to them... Meanwhile they live in a world of privacy-free facebook walls and twitter streams that I personally can't find any use for at all.

I'm pretty convinced that our species is headed for a culture inbetween the ones presented in the movies Idiocracy and Wall-E. Both have a very bleak outlook towards personal relationships.
 
Rexibit said:
This point (while I understand it when you're a teenager) I don't quite get from more mature people:

...And if this is my story, I wonder how many other people are out there like this? A persona entirely different from who they make themselves out to be, if you could just scratch the surface? Like you. Or Brandon. Or anyone we talk to on the internet at all.
Click to expand...
I talk just like I write on the Internet, and don't say anything that I wouldn't face-to-face. I have always assumed that other adults did as well.

Aside from trolling people, what's really the point in trying to be someone different on a forum? If you're roleplaying in a game, cool, I get that. This is a social forum for business discussion, there's no point in trying to be someone you aren't in real life.
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Let me clarify this, as I've had a few people comment on it and it's not going to make sense the way it came across here. This sentence was taken out of original context because it was personal. The point of what this person was saying was people here know me as.... [ fill in the blank] and while that is me, it's just a tiny part of who I am and because we don't see each other and connect on a daily basis, you don't REALLY know me.

Hope that clarifies.
 
I'm pretty convinced that our species is headed for a culture inbetween the ones presented in the movies Idiocracy and Wall-E.
Click to expand...

I'm of the same opinion to be honest.

you don't REALLY know me.
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This is one of the major flaws of it all. You can never really know anyone that you deal with online unless there is some form of semi constant or constant actual face to face time.

Like I said...in this sense the word social is a complete oxymoron and a paradox that is overtaking the world.
 
turbolapp said:
The following are some excerpts of a conversation I was having with another IM. It's something I've been concerned about for a while. Yesterday just brought it to surface:

The internet connects us in only the most superficial of ways. Skype, Twitter and Facebook are great examples of this. You are only who you want to be perceived as being.

The irony is that we've never been so connected in human history and yet, we've never been so isolated as we are today.

Face to face relationships are disarming, we've evolved as a species to be able to comb physical cues for what people are really saying. But we are not yet so evolved as to be able to decode words the same way. And thus, in our ever more connected world, we can talk more without having to say anything at all. There is no better place to hide then on the internet, and because of it's implicit self-reliance and lack of structure, affiliate marketing tends to draw heavily from the well of working-world outcasts- dropouts, convicts, and people just incapable of working for the man for one reason or another. Loners abound in our industry, and I always thought it odd that a bunch of loners could be so social with one another on forums, instant messaging and social media- but we can't escape the world we slip back into when we close the laptop at the end of the day.

...And if this is my story, I wonder how many other people are out there like this? A persona entirely different from who they make themselves out to be, if you could just scratch the surface? Like you. Or Brandon. Or anyone we talk to on the internet at all.

There's a real danger here. People think we're all so connected and that we are progressing as a species and while we are, on a technical level, we're certainly regressing at an emotional one. Humans are a social animal, we need touch and proximity to go along with our conversations and connections.
Click to expand...

ever see blue man group? This is kind of the theme
 
Sounds like we need a differing opinion here. Don't blame social media, it's your own fuckin' fault if you don't go and see your friends face to face. I still go out multiple times every week with the same group of high school friends from 7 years ago, had dinner out 3 times last week with them and went drinking friday. I'm on MSN messenger 24\7, and we're always posting youtube videos on facebook, what's wrong with that?!
 
More musings: (not my words)

...ways of living via the internet have broadened horizons and once the breadth of human experience is understood, you can't shut the lid on Pandora's box. In this way, unlike previous generations, friendships and even intimate relationships are self-selected to a far more granular level then in years past. We can choose to be friends with people that share our political, religious, and even food preferences if we want to- which is not to say that we all do, but once you've shared a relationship with someone who "gets" you, going home to people you don't feel all that connected to becomes far more difficult.

The internet, agency of connection, is great at linking us up to people that we get along smashingly...but we live 3000 miles away from one another. So now knowing that the ability for deeper connection is out there, somewhere, and being unable to actualize it is, at best, frustrating- and at worst, depressing and isolating.
 
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You're onto something here. You should try to get this concept published in a newspaper with serious circulation in order to drop some knowledge on all these trend humpers who think "being social" on the internet is always a good thing for us. +rep
 
Does anyone else think social media is so popular right now because, for most people in the world, they JUST got online?

When I was 9 or 10 and going online via our Prodigy dial up I was always going to chat rooms, forums, etc.--for people who don't know there's something productive to do online they default to social shit.

I have a feeling it'll die down considerably and it'll be mostly adopted by younger kids/teens who are just getting online for the first time. Just a thought though. And yes I appreciate the irony of me participating in a forum about this topic.
 
Great thought, but I'm going to have to dissagree that the internet is driving us apart.

Internet is just another "social" group for me at least. Let me elaborate at least how it is for me:

Childhood friends - these are my boys for life. Although many off us took VERY different directions in life we still manage to get together at least once a year and its as if nothing changed.

College Friends - some of these are better than others, but yeah self explanatory.

IM Friends - The people in the game I'd call a friend are people who I've actually hung out with in person, on multiple occassions. To me these are my friends and theres more to the friendship then the hussle.

IM or Internet Buddies - This is what most people on social networks and WF are to me. Just a name, an avatar, and a persona.

As you can see the key is to have a complete picture of social groups to feel trully connected. And without you my Internet Buddies I know that AM wouldn't be nearly as fun or rewarding.
 
I don't know, anything can be good or bad depending on how you incorporate it into your life. Personally, I realize I should do more f2f, but the Internet hasn't harmed me in that respect. I feel fortunate to know more people than ever, and now I have friends all over the globe due to the Internet.

That said, one sentiment Turbs quoted is very true: now that I have hooked up with so many like-minded people, I have less patience and interest in my family. They're good people, but a lot of them bore me so badly I want to stab my thigh with a salad fork when we get together for meals. Nevertheless, this is nothing new. I just have less tolerance for it.
 
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