Who is Jack Schitt?
(read the whole thing - it gets funnier the more you read)
For some time, many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says "You don't know Jack
Schitt !"
Well, thanks to my geneology efforts, you can now respond in an
intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the
fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N.
Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple
produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull
Schitt, and the twins, Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her
parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school
dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe
Schitt l! ater married Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living
with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known
as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a
son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were
inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the paper
announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He
recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can
correct them
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
(read the whole thing - it gets funnier the more you read)
For some time, many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says "You don't know Jack
Schitt !"
Well, thanks to my geneology efforts, you can now respond in an
intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the
fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N.
Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple
produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull
Schitt, and the twins, Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her
parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school
dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe
Schitt l! ater married Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living
with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known
as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a
son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were
inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the paper
announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He
recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can
correct them
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
