All the recent bullshit, just FML

JCash

JCash

Oldschool IM
Nov 25, 2010
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I can't believe the way everything has gone to shit lately. I got into house flipping 4 years ago, and the first two I did were easy townhouses, paint, carpet, some appliances, profit. In a moment of stark raving insanity I took on a 4000 square foot mcmansion in a small gated community by badlands that was supercheap because the appliances, cabinets, and all the copper had been gutted, the HVAC units stolen, and the pool pump and heater were gone too. No problem, I figured, $15k to rehab the pool, $40k for the HVAC, $30k for cabinets, $30k replumb and rewire, $30k on appliances, and maybe $10k miscellany and I'd still be in profitville around $200k even at a firesale price.

Needless to say I underestimated everything by almost half and the work has been an absolute nightmare. The dipshit contractor is good at one fucking thing - blocking my truck in with his stupid H2 or Corvette while he smokes out back.

Anyway the last fucking step was getting a fucking habitability cert for the insurance/listing/deed shit which I don't completely understand why it's needed but the liar for hire seemed to think so, and the goddamn inspector failed me because the fucking ceiling fans I put in the bedrooms have a remote control, not a hardwired switch, so it's not code compliant. What pisses me off is inspectors have come out at least 3 or 4 times to look at the wiring before closeup and not once did they say "that has to be a real switch." My fucking con-artist-tractor suggested the fucking things and had his guy draw up the wireplan, and when I got him on the phone to ask him to meet me somewhere so I could cave his head in with a baseball bat he acted all "oh yeah I knew that, they have to be hardwired." It was the guy's fucking plan that he supposedly looked at every fucking day during the past year and his guy who came up with it so I'm screaming at him "what the fuck else have you been doing that you supposedly know you're not supposed to do" and my phone just goes dead for no reason. I go back to my truck and get my bro's phone and call my former friend who recommended the guy and find out they're just in the same fucking gun club and my "friend" had never had the guy do any actual work. I'm like "what the fuck do you know how much I've spent on this boxing-my-car-in-motherfucker who's going to cost me about $5k of rip and stitch plus materials not to mention delaying me getting on market...AGAIN! and he's all "oh sorry bro didn't know" so just

Fuck everything, FML.
 


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Yeah I'm not sure, I mean we needed an offensive lineman and Reiff was the best available player but I don't know that he'll be a star in this league ya know? I don't know - I don't hate the pick, but I don't love it either ya know?
 
And get this, not that it's a big deal because the people I care about have my celly and I'm not too interested in new business: at my virtual office they got my company name confused with the company name of this hideous bitch who does incall massages, hideous bitch told VO she was out of business, reception confused and telling callers I'm out of business and getting nasty with clients and potential customers when they offer evidence to the contrary.

Fuck everything, FML.
 
Well, there is where you went wrong - hiring a contractor who drives a Corvette? When have you -ever- seen anyone in a corvette who wasn't a complete fucktard?

Also, best of luck, hope it sorts out for you .
 
Dude I rehab houses and do 50-80% of the work myself including plumbing and electrical. It will take you no more than a day to run a few switches and probably less than 100 bucks.

Contractors are shit though and most will always be shit. They will charge as much as they can and do the shittiest work they can. They look at like it as a "sale" most of the time. Once its closed its done.
 
SkyFire said:
Well, there is where you went wrong - hiring a contractor who drives a Corvette? When have you -ever- seen anyone in a corvette who wasn't a complete fucktard?

Also, best of luck, hope it sorts out for you .
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The first time I met him he was in the H2, and since it wasn't douched up with rims and stuff I was like "yeah fine" the next time he rolls up in a Corvette, walked around with his hands in his pocket, then smoked about half a pack of Marlboros out back while sending texts on his blackberry at about 1 character per hour. You'd think even a monkey with a head injury would eventually remember where the "O" and "K" buttons were on a phone if all they did all day was send texts that said "oK" or "O K" or some hamhanded variation thereupon.
 
BigWill said:
Dude I rehab houses and do 50-80% of the work myself including plumbing and electrical. It will take you no more than a day to run a few switches and probably less than 100 bucks.
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I'm not too handy, I've only found that the only meaningful contribution I can make is when something's needed I go get it because I've found if I let the day labor or tradesguys go to home depot or whatever to get something it's unlikely I'll see them again till the next morning.
 
JCash said:
I'm not too handy, I've only found that the only meaningful contribution I can make is when something's needed I go get it because I've found if I let the day labor or tradesguys go to home depot or whatever to get something it's unlikely I'll see them again till the next morning.
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This isn't meant as a dick slap, but if you aren't at least capable at most things needing to be done around a home in disrepair (drywall, tile, a bit of plumbing and electrical, roofing, etc) flipping might not be the best way to go.

Being able to do it yourself in a pinch will eventually be a life saver, and can save you thousands over the life of a project because you'll more easily be able to call bullshit on suppliers & contractors.
 
Flipping Rule #33:
When calculating repairs, calculate them three times then multiply that number by 3.
 
SkyFire said:
This isn't meant as a dick slap, but if you aren't at least capable at most things needing to be done around a home in disrepair (drywall, tile, a bit of plumbing and electrical, roofing, etc) flipping might not be the best way to go.

Being able to do it yourself in a pinch will eventually be a life saver, and can save you thousands over the life of a project because you'll more easily be able to call bullshit on suppliers & contractors.
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I think I'm learning that the hard way. I have awesome painters and flooring guys and good handymen I found just by dumb luck doing work on my own house and through property managers and almost enjoyed flipping the townhouses even though the margins weren't as high and the turnover is nowhere near as fast but the total rehab shit could give beyer a headache.
 
I used a hammer a few times. When the nail goes in straight I feel accomplished.
 
lol, it would take maybe 2 hours at most to run a wire to the fan down to the switch and a feed to the switch. Can we stop with the serious answers plx.

Unarmed Gunman said:
Yeah I'm not sure, I mean we needed an offensive lineman and Reiff was the best available player but I don't know that he'll be a star in this league ya know? I don't know - I don't hate the pick, but I don't love it either ya know?
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He is going to be a real solid lineman for years to come. I would say he is just as good as Kalil.
 
ItsYoBuddy said:
lol, it would take maybe 2 hours at most to run a wire to the fan down to the switch and a feed to the switch. Can we stop with the serious answers plx.
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LOL THERE'S NO FUCKING SWITCH IT'S A REMOTE CONTROL, THERE'S NO FUCKING WIRES IN THE WALL JUST A JUNCTION BOX IN THE ATTIC AND THE THING ABOUT HAVING TO CUT FIRESTOPS AND POP OUT DRYWALL SEEMS PRETTY PLAUSIBLE. Can you stop with the talking out your ass plx?
 
Odd irony is the internets has the same reaction as trades I've brought in in the past, I describe a problem, they say "lolol that's like an hour's work somebody's yanking you" they come out and say "yeah that's a lot of work you're going to have to..." and repeat what I told them that they lolol at initially. Fuck everything/everyone.
 
JCash said:
LOL THERE'S NO FUCKING SWITCH IT'S A REMOTE CONTROL, THERE'S NO FUCKING WIRES IN THE WALL JUST A JUNCTION BOX IN THE ATTIC AND THE THING ABOUT HAVING TO CUT FIRESTOPS AND POP OUT DRYWALL SEEMS PRETTY PLAUSIBLE. Can you stop with the talking out your ass plx?
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Step 1: Buy a switch
Step 2: Cut the box out
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Success
 
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