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BenPOF

https://ads.pof.com
Nov 2, 2009
1,276
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Vancouver, BC
www.pof.com
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY WICKEDFIRE!

[ame=http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005MR3IVO/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=boingboing06-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B005MR3IVO]Amazon.com: Passion Natural Water-Based Lubricant - 55 Gallon: Health & Personal Care[/ame]
 


[ame=http://www.amazon.com/3B-Scientific-W43014-Testicle-Self/dp/B005OSVZN4/ref=pd_sim_sbs_hpc_5]Amazon.com: 3B Scientific W43014 Testicle Self Exam Form: Industrial & Scientific[/ame]
 
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Lol @ the "reviews"...

The product only took a week to arrive, and got to my apartment just in time for my first real "date" since the gas station incident. You can bet I was nervous for this one. When I got off the bus to meet Carla in front of the Chili's, I just about had a heart attack! The only thing keeping me calm was knowing that I could not possibly run out of lube that night. I gave Carla a reassuring nod and smile, as if to say "Don't worry, Carla, I have plenty of lubricant for later."

The dinner was great, and after knocking back a couple Mojo Mango Margaritas, we were ready to head back to my apartment. I winked and told Carla, "Let's SLIP on out of here," to see if she understood the lubricant lingo. I think she did. Throughout the bus ride back, I grinned and hummed Luther Vandross tunes to set the mood.

When we got to my place, I already had a candle burning. It was by "Glade", which I think you pronounce like the singer Sade, because it is an exotic candle that smells just like real pine. After we got comfortable, I asked Carla if she could help me with the lube. She looked at me weird, and I couldn't tell if it was because she thought it was "too soon" or because I was pushing a mechanical lift to get the drum barrel out of the storage closet.

As a Fertility Specialist for Pachyderms, this was exactly what we needed to help rebuild elephant populations all over sub-saharan africa. It's not all just Medications and IVF treatments. Some times you need a loudspeaker, a Barry White CD and a 55 Gallon drum of Lube.

This is a hazard! I've already lost two cats in this thing. There should be a warning sticker or something. I assumed the cats would float
 
I fucking nearly choked on my coffee reading the Barry White reference one. :D

This is a hazard! I've already lost two cats in this thing. There should be a warning sticker or something. I assumed the cats would float, but they sunk like rocks into the lube. And no, it's not what you think. Don't be disgusting. I was trying to create my own cat lube wrestling league. You know, for sickos.
 
[ame="http://www.amazon.com/Ass-Goblins-Auschwitz-Cameron-Pierce/dp/1933929936/ref=pd_sim_sbs_hpc_7"]Amazon.com: Ass Goblins of Auschwitz (9781933929934): Cameron Pierce: Books[/ame]


In a land where black snow falls in the shape of swastikas, there exists a nightmarish prison camp known as Auschwitz. It is run by a fascist, flatulent race of aliens called the Ass Goblins, who travel in apple-shaped spaceships to abduct children from the neighboring world of Kidland. Prisoners 999 and 1001 are conjoined twin brothers forced to endure the sadistic tortures of these ass-shaped monsters. To survive, they must eat kid skin and work all day constructing bicycles and sex dolls out of dead children.

While the Ass Goblins become drunk on cider made from fermented children, the twins plot their escape. But it won't be easy. They must overcome toilet toads, cockrats, ass dolls, and the surgical experiments that are slowly mutating them into goblin-child hybrids.

Forget everything you know about Auschwitz...you're about to be Shit Slaughtered.
 
reviews and those related products are fucking epic.

This is just amazing: [ame="http://www.amazon.com/Images-UFO-02-Detector/dp/B000FVUKKO/ref=pd_sbs_indust_4"]Amazon.com: UFO-02 Detector: Industrial & Scientific[/ame]
 
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This review is from: How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide for Asian Men (Paperback)
Now I know a few new things. First, white women don't particularly like tentacles. I shouldn't take photographs of them and print their images on body pillows. Don't ask them for "Saki", huge misunderstanding occurred.

I'm now in a serious relationship with a white woman, and I couldn't be happier.
 
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By
[ame="http://www.amazon.com/gp/pdp/profile/A29CUCGRX04TS8/ref=cm_cr_dp_pdp"]Sailoil[/ame] - [ame="http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member-reviews/A29CUCGRX04TS8/ref=cm_cr_dp_auth_rev?ie=UTF8&sort_by=MostRecentReview"]See all my reviews[/ame]


This review is from: Relaxman Relaxation Capsule
One drawback, when it was delivered the capsule had no bolt on the outside. But I'm handy, so I installed one.

I have been locking the wife and kids into the chamber from 7pm to 7am every evening, and boy am I relaxed. This really works.