Dad discovers porn in son's browser history - takes a different (brilliant) approach

Problems with porn:

*Doesn't teach you where the clit it, so giving a real woman actual orgasms is going to be fucking next to impossible because today's kids have no work ethic and porn stars pretend they're having orgasms when they're not, leading young men into false expectations about the whole dynamic of giving/receiving pleasure (ie: it's all about me jacking off and fuck the woman, which doesn't help them achieve lasting happiness in relationships)

*It's all about the orgasm, not about actually relating to, communicating with, or loving a woman; so when these expectations come up early in the dating period, fuckers are clueless
 


I have some virgin friends...28 years old and porn addicts.

Their "standards" are absurdly high because they've watched thousands of porn stars getting banged the past decade. They don't go out much so most of the women they see are hot pornstars on their computer screen.

Unfortunately what this means is they're only capable of getting maybe 5's, but they only want 8,9's, and 10's like they see in the movies. It's kind of a catch -22.

How do you know they are porn addicts? They say it loud and proudly?
 
kingofsp: Looks like your comment is kind of directed at me. Just to clarify - I don't give a crap what two consenting 'ADULTS' do in the privacy of their own home. Period, end of story.

However, can we agree that watching fetish porn might not be the best idea for kids between the ages of let's say 0-16? I personally don't want my daughters getting their perspective of what it is like to be intimate with a partner from pr0n at that age. At least for me, that is my role as a parent. What they do once they are over 18? That's up to them and the things THEY personally enjoy. It's called experimentation (if the idea comes from a video so be it) and part of being an adult.
 
Please go die in a fire, and don't stop to procreate on the way there. :thumbsup:


My approach: Buy the kid a Real Doll. Explain that his reproductive system is on overdrive now, and porn only stokes those fires, but if he thinks of actual women that way he's in for a horrible life... So take it out on the real doll and keep that part of his life separate from his dating life.

You want to spend $6k so your kid can jerk off?

I know I'm old, but that shit was free when I was a kid.

EDIT: If you want a real doll with a vagina, no testicles, and a permanently limp penis, it's going to cost you at least $7k.

5a3nli.jpg
 
You want to spend $6k so your kid can jerk off?

I know I'm old, but that shit was free when I was a kid.
Well there's something more that a realdoll can offer than just a hand job or even a fleshlight... The physical experience of having the whole woman there. I'm not a psychiatrist nor a sex therapist, but I bet if Junior screwed a real doll six ways to sunday in every position imaginable, then he wouldn't be so distracted by the girls around him in class so much (Like I obviously was) when he should be concentrating on making grades.

$6k is nothing to give your spawn confidence (Ok, more indifference than confidence, technically) around the ladies... Then he'll not only do better in his schooling and early career, but he can hold out past the first girl's marriage hints to find the true winnar and marry her...

This takes the desperation to get married for 'steady pussy' totally out of the equation. :thumbsup:


Edit: What have you got against testicles, anyway???
 
Well there's something more that a realdoll can offer than just a hand job or even a fleshlight... he can hold out past the first girl's marriage hints to find the true winnar and marry her...

LOLOL

Lukey, your twisted little fingers never cease to amaze and titillate, bro.

Keep bangin them, you sick little freak! :drinkup:
 
Well there's something more that a realdoll can offer than just a hand job or even a fleshlight... The physical experience of having the whole woman there. I'm not a psychiatrist nor a sex therapist, but I bet if Junior screwed a real doll six ways to sunday in every position imaginable, then he wouldn't be so distracted by the girls around him in class so much (Like I obviously was) when he should be concentrating on making grades.

$6k is nothing to give your spawn confidence (Ok, more indifference than confidence, technically) around the ladies... Then he'll not only do better in his schooling and early career, but he can hold out past the first girl's marriage hints to find the true winnar and marry her...

This takes the desperation to get married for 'steady pussy' totally out of the equation. :thumbsup:


Edit: What have you got against testicles, anyway???

Sure, but if your child's schoolfriends ever discovered this fact, he would be teased to the point of suicide.
 
Lukey, your twisted little fingers never cease to amaze and titillate, bro.

Keep bangin them, you sick little freak! :drinkup:
Um, no. Disclosure time:

I've been married since before the Real Doll was on the market. My wife would not be into that, either.

I'm approaching this strictly from a parental standpoint. During his formulative years, your child can either spend 99% of his time chasing girls, (with all of the danger that comes with) or he can have something like a real doll release most of these distracting urges instead. Seems like a total logic win to me.


Sure, but if your child's schoolfriends ever discovered this fact, he would be teased to the point of suicide.
Yeah, there are bumps on this road too. Clearly society would need to be more accepting, which I'm hoping the internet will bring about soon.
 
Um, no. Disclosure time:

I've been married since before the Real Doll was on the market. My wife would not be into that, either.

I'm approaching this strictly from a parental standpoint. During his formulative years, your child can either spend 99% of his time chasing girls, (with all of the danger that comes with) or he can have something like a real doll release most of these distracting urges instead. Seems like a total logic win to me.



Yeah, there are bumps on this road too. Clearly society would need to be more accepting, which I'm hoping the internet will bring about soon.

A LOOK INTO YOUR CHILD'S FUTURE*


1df4d94f-9081-4cce-889f-737447f44e8d.jpg



*If you actually did this.
 
Um, no. Disclosure time:

I've been married since before the Real Doll was on the market. My wife would not be into that, either.

I'm approaching this strictly from a parental standpoint. During his formulative years, your child can either spend 99% of his time chasing girls, (with all of the danger that comes with) or he can have something like a real doll release most of these distracting urges instead. Seems like a total logic win to me.



Yeah, there are bumps on this road too. Clearly society would need to be more accepting, which I'm hoping the internet will bring about soon.

You missed it entirely bro- I wasn't trying to imply that YOU might deign to bang a "realdoll", lol.

I was talking about the incredibly bizarre societal mindset and rationalizations that appear whenever you "Bang your twisted little fingers on your KEYBOARD".

:hollering:
 
Problems with porn:

*Doesn't teach you where the clit it, so giving a real woman actual orgasms is going to be fucking next to impossible because today's kids have no work ethic and porn stars pretend they're having orgasms when they're not, leading young men into false expectations about the whole dynamic of giving/receiving pleasure (ie: it's all about me jacking off and fuck the woman, which doesn't help them achieve lasting happiness in relationships)

*It's all about the orgasm, not about actually relating to, communicating with, or loving a woman; so when these expectations come up early in the dating period, fuckers are clueless

My solution would certainly not be to provide my son with porn. Instead I will help him get laid, and make sure he has a solid work ethic when it comes to working the clit.

"That's right, son, just like that. Now keep your tongue going, now slide a finger up her asshole. Ok, there ya go, great."
 
I'm approaching this strictly from a parental standpoint. During his formulative years, your child can either spend 99% of his time chasing girls, (with all of the danger that comes with) or he can have something like a real doll release most of these distracting urges instead. Seems like a total logic win to me.

wait wait... your trolling, right? You got me luke!
 
wait wait... your trolling, right? You got me luke!
That's not the way that I troll... Although I admit it's a bit unorthodox and the world isn't really ready for such good parenting yet. (amateursurgeon's point being a perfect example why.)

There is also the risk that the kid will prefer the realdoll over the real thing, (You gotta admit, he won't have to satisfy her needs nor put up with her PMSing) so I'd recommend some kind of long-term tests be done in reality before telling a parent to start doing this. The theory is sound though.
 
I'm pretty sure The Church Of Satan is all about banging Real Dolls. Maybe they will sponsor the required research, to insure that it's safe for 13 year old boys across America to ignore kissing girls their own age, in favor of cumming in the asses of super-realistic rubber porn stars.