Help With Landing Page

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OK, this is coming from someone who sucks at designing ad copy and LP's so honestly, I could be wrong but I think the Southpark video might distract your visitors and give them a reason NOT to click through to the offer page.

Also, the blue header takes up too much valuable above-the-fold space
 
I'll give it a go:

1. Site header is messed in FF

2. Don't name the page - landingpage.html - name it spoofcard-change-hide-phone-number.html or something relevant with your main keys in it.

3. The header is uglay - Grab some stock and make a quick custom one in psd. that is relevant to your topic.

4. Did you mine your keywords for this for all on and off page seo? Are you PPC'ing or bumming? You have no meta seo and little on page seo.

5. The video didn't work - get rid of it and put another cheater shot or business to business shot...

6. You have very little continuity in design going from the lander to the merchant. That is very important to have imo. Perhaps grab some of the graphics/colors/elements from the publishers page to create good continuity.

7. It's good that you're using a short/sweet approach - too often aff's try to retain the visitors with long scrolls or keyword stuffed reviews etc. when the whole point is to get them the fuk off that page/cookie/push to lander asap... However your calls to action are weak - "Totally private - Totally fun - Totally Legal and untraceable!!" were the first things that grabbed my eyes on their page - along with:
img_featured.png
<< Use that on your page if you can.

8. The copywriting is not bad however having some general point form info/features/benefits like they do would yield better results so add some above or below your testimoinals....

9. The headertitles "Find out for sure with spoofcard"... unless someone reads the first bit - that doesn't make sense - and it didn't for me... That is the first thing that is going to draw the eye on that page - make better use of it. "Catch Him/Her Cheating" or "Mask Your Phone Number" or "Change What Someone Sees On Their Caller iD" etc..

10. I would personally get rid of that first paragraph, it runs on and is way more complex than it needs to be - the merchants site does a great job of explaining what this does - let them go into all those details - you just tease them with amazing emotion playing and psychology based reading to :CLICKCLICK: to know more...

Cheers hope that helps.
N.
 
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N,

Thank you for those suggestions, they were tremendously helpful. I think i've got a page now that is "acceptable". The page is not meant for SEO. I read in a post here today it's good to have a landing page that correlates with a blog.

I'll work on a header to put in later.
 
I think any noob or anyone wanting to create some good landers can learn from these points. Although someone may be in different niches, your feedback is still relevant.

Good stuff...


ncmedia said:
I'll give it a go:

1. Site header is messed in FF

2. Don't name the page - landingpage.html - name it spoofcard-change-hide-phone-number.html or something relevant with your main keys in it.

3. The header is uglay - Grab some stock and make a quick custom one in psd. that is relevant to your topic.

4. Did you mine your keywords for this for all on and off page seo? Are you PPC'ing or bumming? You have no meta seo and little on page seo.

5. The video didn't work - get rid of it and put another cheater shot or business to business shot...

6. You have very little continuity in design going from the lander to the merchant. That is very important to have imo. Perhaps grab some of the graphics/colors/elements from the publishers page to create good continuity.

7. It's good that you're using a short/sweet approach - too often aff's try to retain the visitors with long scrolls or keyword stuffed reviews etc. when the whole point is to get them the fuk off that page/cookie/push to lander asap... However your calls to action are weak - "Totally private - Totally fun - Totally Legal and untraceable!!" were the first things that grabbed my eyes on their page - along with:
img_featured.png
<< Use that on your page if you can.

8. The copywriting is not bad however having some general point form info/features/benefits like they do would yield better results so add some above or below your testimoinals....

9. The headertitles "Find out for sure with spoofcard"... unless someone reads the first bit - that doesn't make sense - and it didn't for me... That is the first thing that is going to draw the eye on that page - make better use of it. "Catch Him/Her Cheating" or "Mask Your Phone Number" or "Change What Someone Sees On Their Caller iD" etc..

10. I would personally get rid of that first paragraph, it runs on and is way more complex than it needs to be - the merchants site does a great job of explaining what this does - let them go into all those details - you just tease them with amazing emotion playing and psychology based reading to :CLICKCLICK: to know more...

Cheers hope that helps.
N.
Click to expand...
 
Cheers it looks much better. Just noticed my help got me a reputation beyond repute so thank you in turn :)

Will still add: Think about your audience, you're trying to convert people into sales - not so sure that 'playing pranks' is something a big audience would pay to do with their phones... I would perhaps focus more on your core audience and what they would use this for like 'call centers NEED this' with a business shot or 'my staff is protected' or whatever other creative core audience benefits you can think of.

In your footer - close it off with an amazing one liner in big bold (I know flame me here) - The average user still reads left+top to right+bottom - that last call to action attempt is important - "Get your $x off Spoofcard or try it FREE here>>" in big/bold.

Best of luck with your conversions.

@nohel: Thank you sir.
 
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crazyfish said:
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Click to expand...


same here,

but that fact that ur using wordpress, i would recommend paying someone $50 to do an LP, and then throw WP on the just for content sake. hard to make a good looking LP with wordpress on your own, especially if your not a designer

(here was the first affiliate offer i did ever. it was with WP: iWon Games- Is It Legit?. also had Best Vacation Deals - Find Cheap Family Vacation Packages With the Free Travel Newsletter From Dunhill. both offers are expired now...
NOTE: iwon was my first LP and offer i ever ran about 9 months ago, pls. dont critique. Travel news wasn't far behind....)
 
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