THE WORLD WILL END IN 2012. WHAT DO I DO??
- Thread starter Denver Gamio
- Start date
In 2012 the earth will pass through a cosmic radiation field and gravitational belt turning all human brains to jello. During this time, the gravitational belt aligns with existent dark matter, pulling apart space itself and slowing the time space continuum. Therefore, all humans subjected to this radiation will have there brains turned into jello in a single second, but it will feel like 1000 years of excruciating pain because of the slowing continuum.
You can only survive 2012 by obtaining the following equipment:
Aluminum Foil head covering - protects against the radiation
Radioshack Calculator Watch - allows you to speed the time space continuum (please see the owners manual)
Heavy Duty Spoon and Straw - to eat all the jello brains. It will be lime jello with chucks of banana.
It is still a little early, but when the time comes I will be selling these kits for $12,000 a piece. Think of it as an investment though!! You will be able to steal all the money you want once everyone else's brain is turned to jello!! Win - win situation here. Now for today and today only, I'm offering these kits for only $6,000.
You can only survive 2012 by obtaining the following equipment:
Aluminum Foil head covering - protects against the radiation
Radioshack Calculator Watch - allows you to speed the time space continuum (please see the owners manual)
Heavy Duty Spoon and Straw - to eat all the jello brains. It will be lime jello with chucks of banana.
It is still a little early, but when the time comes I will be selling these kits for $12,000 a piece. Think of it as an investment though!! You will be able to steal all the money you want once everyone else's brain is turned to jello!! Win - win situation here. Now for today and today only, I'm offering these kits for only $6,000.
Trust me.. If it did happen, doubt you would go... "Oh shiiittteeee, check out the waves man!!!!! Surf's up"
OMG Wait? You mean computers control the electricity... but the computers need electricity to control the electricity...
</sarcasm>
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrQUWUfmR_I"]YouTube - The IT Crowd - Break the internet[/ame]
Who cares if its the end of the world? Just live your life, smoke weed, and get some pussy. And of course, monetize my "my little pony" website...wait
2012 is the dumbest thing. The Mayan calendar just reaches 13 baktuns - and from that simple fact(combined with the alignment), people have become retarded. And the movie looks as if it has no idea who exactly the villain is supposed to be.
First I'd like to thank Fear... none of this would be possible without you my friend. You had me at hello. And how could I forget good ol' Paranoia. Where would we be without you and all your shenanigans? Forgive me for being emotional. :sadcrying4:
Seriously though, there must be so much money to be made in all this Doomsday and 2012 prophecy bullshit. Maybe I should put together a fuckin' survival kit or something and sell that to all the "believers." :uhoh2:
Yeah, that's the ticket. :338:
Seriously though, there must be so much money to be made in all this Doomsday and 2012 prophecy bullshit. Maybe I should put together a fuckin' survival kit or something and sell that to all the "believers." :uhoh2:
Yeah, that's the ticket. :338:
I just thought it pretty cool and funny you said "the calendar just reaches 13 baktuns - and from that simple fact" in the same sentence.
Anybody who can say "13 baktuns" with a straight face deserves +rep, so given.
On a side note, and not that I believe in this crap, there's more than the planetary alignment issues with 2012, there's also the earth tilting on its axis (once every 27,000 years or whatever, dont quote me as I have no idea what the # is, but I do know the axis does do a diff't tilt that year), and scientist's fears of a giant Sun solar flare happening then.
Of course nobody mentions the possibility Obama could be re-elected in '12 which could certainly explain the Earth exploding. <laugh track>