Welcome to Your Quarter Life Crisis
- Thread starter kingofsp
- Start date
I do. Got a couple of bromances goin' on.
Good man! I don't know much, if any other people that actually have a strong set of friends. As gay as it sounds, I'm really happy that I got my best friends. When shit hits the fan, they've always been there for me and vice versa. I'm kind of lucky that I do have this support system of friends and family.
I'm torn about the control thing. For one, I'd like to think we have control over some things. After all, the decisions we make are ours and we can choose to go the other way if we wanted to. On the other hand, I feel sometimes that there's a predestined path and you were destined to make certain choices. I've never been able to really choose a side.
I always think that everything happens for a reason. I've been dealt with a lot of shit in the past and still am, but when I look back, certain things needed to happen, whether it was for personal growth or to trigger a certain event in the future. But then again, shit happens...
HarveyJ
He is - THE CACTUS!
Whilst I fit perfectly into this anecdotal category, I find I rarely feel this way.
I have bouts of depression because I'm chemically inclined to it, but by and large, I have a surety of purpose in life (pissing off guerrilla!... I kid, I kid) that I get through doing the things I want to do like a rock tour I'm trying to get setup for late 2010, and being involved in community/charity projects.
That I bumblebee my way through life without a set goal has never really bothered me, and I think it's because I know that there really isn't a goal unless I want there to be one.
Do I regret doing some things and not others? Yeah.
But I'm also aware that the things I did do that I regret have led to things that I really don't and that I've got a few more decades to do the things I didn't do because I can probably engineer the situation to give me another crack at it.
That's a dingo. They only look that happy after eating a baby.
(Actually, they're apparently really good pets if you can get a license for them)
I have bouts of depression because I'm chemically inclined to it, but by and large, I have a surety of purpose in life (pissing off guerrilla!... I kid, I kid) that I get through doing the things I want to do like a rock tour I'm trying to get setup for late 2010, and being involved in community/charity projects.
That I bumblebee my way through life without a set goal has never really bothered me, and I think it's because I know that there really isn't a goal unless I want there to be one.
Do I regret doing some things and not others? Yeah.
But I'm also aware that the things I did do that I regret have led to things that I really don't and that I've got a few more decades to do the things I didn't do because I can probably engineer the situation to give me another crack at it.
That's a dingo. They only look that happy after eating a baby.
(Actually, they're apparently really good pets if you can get a license for them)
No, but you can control the lowest common denominator. You.
You don't have to be god, in order to assert yourself.
Kinda like deja vu. When I was 26 things were not all that interesting so I sold all my shit and moved to Hong Kong. Best move I could have made. I felt like things were in a rut and that really shook it up. Ended up staying like 6 years and travelled around the area.
Ended up marrying there and now that I'm back in North America I look around at others my age and see I'm doing fine.
No regrets. You only go around once. I could have been here "paying my dues" but got a job over there at place I'd unlikely get hired at here. That's like 10 years ago and it seems a lot of others did the same around that time too.
If you feel you're stagnating (like I did) then make some changes in your life. Sell your shit and move before your in your mid 30's and have a real crisis. DIFN
Ended up marrying there and now that I'm back in North America I look around at others my age and see I'm doing fine.
No regrets. You only go around once. I could have been here "paying my dues" but got a job over there at place I'd unlikely get hired at here. That's like 10 years ago and it seems a lot of others did the same around that time too.
If you feel you're stagnating (like I did) then make some changes in your life. Sell your shit and move before your in your mid 30's and have a real crisis. DIFN
^^Damn the out of context sigs. They'll be the death of me. Or the divorce of me.
Anyway, I was coming back to this thread to say, Jack, maybe it's time to just get out of LA. That town will kill you like a frog in boiling water. You won't even know it's happening and then BAM your a floater.
Anyway, I was coming back to this thread to say, Jack, maybe it's time to just get out of LA. That town will kill you like a frog in boiling water. You won't even know it's happening and then BAM your a floater.
I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the book that started the entire concept of the quarter-life concept.
[ame=http://www.amazon.com/Quarterlife-Crisis-Unique-Challenges-Twenties/dp/B000W0K3N2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1254362776&sr=8-1]Amazon.com: Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties: Alexandra Robbins, Abby Wilner: Books[/ame]
I bought the book when I was about 21 and realized I'd tracked myself directly into a high-profile career I hated simply because I had the ability and never realized it wasn't what I wanted to actually do.
It took about a month of soul searching to figure out what I wanted most from my life had nothing to do with making partner in Arthur Andersen by the time I was thirty or whatever. Within the year, I took a huge paycut and started a career that I'd do for free (and believe me, judging by those paychecks, I think I might be.) I'm still there 9 years later and loving it. I'm able to choose a fulfilling career because my other needs are already met.
If I remember correctly, this is the original premise of the quarterlife crisis. Gen X and Y (and future gens) kids grow up with all basic needs and comforts met. In addition they grow up with visibly successful parents. Typically kids grow up with the goal of doing better than their parents did and finding stability through a career. Since the kids already have that or aren't able to "beat" their parents, they wind up listless and bored until they realize what creates true rewards for them personally.
Judging by what I see around me on a daily basis, I'd argue most people my age have no idea still what they want in life and since nobody is going to tell them what to do about it so they just sit around whining about being bored, having a job they hate and how unfair life is. It's pathetic, but that's just one happy 30-year-old speaking.
[ame=http://www.amazon.com/Quarterlife-Crisis-Unique-Challenges-Twenties/dp/B000W0K3N2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1254362776&sr=8-1]Amazon.com: Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties: Alexandra Robbins, Abby Wilner: Books[/ame]
I bought the book when I was about 21 and realized I'd tracked myself directly into a high-profile career I hated simply because I had the ability and never realized it wasn't what I wanted to actually do.
It took about a month of soul searching to figure out what I wanted most from my life had nothing to do with making partner in Arthur Andersen by the time I was thirty or whatever. Within the year, I took a huge paycut and started a career that I'd do for free (and believe me, judging by those paychecks, I think I might be.) I'm still there 9 years later and loving it. I'm able to choose a fulfilling career because my other needs are already met.
If I remember correctly, this is the original premise of the quarterlife crisis. Gen X and Y (and future gens) kids grow up with all basic needs and comforts met. In addition they grow up with visibly successful parents. Typically kids grow up with the goal of doing better than their parents did and finding stability through a career. Since the kids already have that or aren't able to "beat" their parents, they wind up listless and bored until they realize what creates true rewards for them personally.
Judging by what I see around me on a daily basis, I'd argue most people my age have no idea still what they want in life and since nobody is going to tell them what to do about it so they just sit around whining about being bored, having a job they hate and how unfair life is. It's pathetic, but that's just one happy 30-year-old speaking.
At first I was was like ... this guy is right. But then... I see what you did there.
Good way to get rid of the younger, more talented competition eh? Good try....Good freakin' try...
You have to LOVE what you do!
Period. That's the secret. There's no other way to true success.
This "success is a destination" mentality that over 90% of people on this planet have is what leads to depression and feelings of emptiness.
If you want to experience real success you have to constantly be in a state of gratitude but... never satisfied.
Stop growing... and start dying.
Of course, there's more to life than money. But you know what... there's a lot more to life than just lying around on a beach with your family. Family and friends want to be around someone who's excited and passionate about what they do, not someone who's been chasing money and is now projecting a kind of energy that yells "I don't like how I spend most of my time and now I'm escaping my life by spending time with you!"
There's plenty of parents who have plenty of time to spend with their kids... they have the nice cushy retirement, the free time... etc but you know what? They're miserable.
They have no purpose... no excitement... they've bought into the retirement myth and they feel empty inside and think a cruise to Alaska may solve it. Wrong. And this is why in so many cases their children don't even want to spend time with them!
Then there's genuinely successful people who are incredibly busy and love what they do. But when they do spend time with their kids... their kids genuinely value the time they spend with their parents. And they respect them a lot more... even if they don't know why at a young age.
This is just my opinion... And don't get me wrong, I LOVE the simple things in life... sex, nature, relationships, laughing, food, sex... etc but personally I can't stand mediocrity.
If you tell me you want to do $100,000 per month, I'll be the LAST person to tell you that you're thinking too big. And if you have a genuine sense of urgency to make it happen... all the better! Let's ride.
I think this might sound like some motivational rant but I had to write it because I strongly disagree with some of the posts here implying that "you can have money or happiness, but you can't have both".
Period. That's the secret. There's no other way to true success.
This "success is a destination" mentality that over 90% of people on this planet have is what leads to depression and feelings of emptiness.
If you want to experience real success you have to constantly be in a state of gratitude but... never satisfied.
Stop growing... and start dying.
Of course, there's more to life than money. But you know what... there's a lot more to life than just lying around on a beach with your family. Family and friends want to be around someone who's excited and passionate about what they do, not someone who's been chasing money and is now projecting a kind of energy that yells "I don't like how I spend most of my time and now I'm escaping my life by spending time with you!"
There's plenty of parents who have plenty of time to spend with their kids... they have the nice cushy retirement, the free time... etc but you know what? They're miserable.
They have no purpose... no excitement... they've bought into the retirement myth and they feel empty inside and think a cruise to Alaska may solve it. Wrong. And this is why in so many cases their children don't even want to spend time with them!
Then there's genuinely successful people who are incredibly busy and love what they do. But when they do spend time with their kids... their kids genuinely value the time they spend with their parents. And they respect them a lot more... even if they don't know why at a young age.
This is just my opinion... And don't get me wrong, I LOVE the simple things in life... sex, nature, relationships, laughing, food, sex... etc but personally I can't stand mediocrity.
If you tell me you want to do $100,000 per month, I'll be the LAST person to tell you that you're thinking too big. And if you have a genuine sense of urgency to make it happen... all the better! Let's ride.
I think this might sound like some motivational rant but I had to write it because I strongly disagree with some of the posts here implying that "you can have money or happiness, but you can't have both".
If my comment about the pay cut is included in your thought, I'll clarify - If you do what you love, and that naturally leads to money-making opportunities, you're in business. I'm reasonably sure there aren't many others on here wishing and hoping to work with at-risk teenagers, damn the cost. That being said, if you're out to make a million just to make a million and who cares how so long as you get it done, you're setting yourself up for failure.
I absolutely agree - do what you love. Then find ways to monetize it.
This is turning into one of those meaning of life threads... So i think some people here are missing a few things.
Mainly, money = fucking nothing, if you don't have your health. Money comes and goes, but you only have 1 body.
So in order of importance, and possibly the recipe to happiness:
1. Health
2. Family/Friends
3. Money/Career
I put family and friends ahead of money because if you have no moniez, you can probably borrow some least if you have a good social circle.
Mainly, money = fucking nothing, if you don't have your health. Money comes and goes, but you only have 1 body.
So in order of importance, and possibly the recipe to happiness:
1. Health
2. Family/Friends
3. Money/Career
I put family and friends ahead of money because if you have no moniez, you can probably borrow some least if you have a good social circle.
Get away from me kid, ya' botherin' me. Move along now. Yer messing up my business.
This thread is starting to remind me of the one with the guy who just left his job and was making table in the garage and some people said he is wasting time.
Someone made a great post there, about split testing.
Obviously, happiness is going to be different for every human being. I feel extremely lucky because I feel happy and appreciate every moment, but it took a hell of a lot of bad luck and suffering to get here.
But really, people just need to split test things Find out what works for you. Freedom or rules, beaches or being a workaholic, poor or rich, alone or with friends.
Someone made a great post there, about split testing.
Obviously, happiness is going to be different for every human being. I feel extremely lucky because I feel happy and appreciate every moment, but it took a hell of a lot of bad luck and suffering to get here.
But really, people just need to split test things
Find out what works for you. Freedom or rules, beaches or being a workaholic, poor or rich, alone or with friends.
Must...resist.....Australian...accent... THE DINGO ATE YUR BABAY!
turbolapp said:
Sweet, i made the list!
I wake up every day and get to do what *I* want to and spend time with my family which is the most important thing in the world to me and we're all healthy/happy.
The rest of the 'things' in my life are just that, meaningless things. Doesn't mean I don't get some enjoyment out of them, doesn't mean I won't buy them, but they hold no real value to me.
However I will never give back my freedom/time to a 50+ hour a week corporation, not for anything.
The rest of the 'things' in my life are just that, meaningless things. Doesn't mean I don't get some enjoyment out of them, doesn't mean I won't buy them, but they hold no real value to me.
However I will never give back my freedom/time to a 50+ hour a week corporation, not for anything.