I sat up and looked around at the vista. The rows of terraced council houses where we lived were straight in front; smoke emanating out of several of the chimney pots despite the fact it was summer. To the left of the houses was the village stadium with its small enclosure showing clear signs of neglect and decay. My reflection of the views were interrupted by a loud yell coming from down below but on the opposite side. Jane and Tam were already there at- “The Fort “a stone ruin clearly displaying a “Keep out .Danger” sign which was lying at a ninety degree angle to the building .The sign was ignored by al the local children who re-enacted tales of cowboys and Indians, kings and queens within its walls. Thus “The Fort” was so named by the many local children who had scaled its derelict depths. It had once been part of a working coal-mine but the mine and its workers were long gone and this grey stone ruin and the coal slag or bing were the only evidence that this site had once been a hive of industry.
Anyone who tells you that women don’t know what they want just isn’t listening closely enough. Yes, they change their mind about what they’re going to wear tonight and who’s their best friend faster than you change your underwear (so more than once a week), but there’s one question they ask that NEVER changes:
“Where have all the real men gone???”
It’s the same thing, night after night, across bars, nightclubs, social gatherings and whispered between groups of friends.
Beautiful, confident, intelligent women all over the
world want real Men. They CRAVE real Men.
They’re sick of little boys spend more time pretending to be impressive than actually doing anything impressive and who’re only as interested in having sex with them as far as they can use it to boost their reputation with a group of faceless guys in an online forum.
They want strong, confident, internally validated,
powerful Men who can take them on a journey without ever needing them to follow and who have the strength to live their life on their terms, regardless of how she responds.
And yet the problem still remains.
Why? Because most males don’t know the difference between a boy and a Man, let alone how to be a Man.
They’re lost. They’re alone. They’re confused.
So, for the sake of lost boys and beautiful women everywhere, here is a 20 point checklist you can use to work out where you currently sit on the boy / Man spectrum and where you really need to focus your attention if you want to start attracting beautiful, confident, in-demand women.
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NOTE: When I’m talking about a Man, I’m not referring to an adult male. Being a real Man has nothing to do with age. Whether or not you’re a Man is determined by your mindset, regardless of age.
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1. Boys claim. Men do.
Boys are the ones telling you about how many chicks they’ve hooked up with or how much money they earn or how many trophies they won or how cool they are.
They brag and claim and yell as loud as they can so that everyone knows how important / successful / good they are can validate them accordingly.
Men, on the other hand, are just doing what they want and don’t care what anyone thinks about it.
They’re not talking about all the hot chicks they hook up with, they’re out meeting hot chicks.
They’re not talking about how many trophies they’ve won, they’re out winning trophies.
Men know how transient, empty, and unfulfilling other peoples praise is and so work to find the only long lasting source of happiness – creation through action.
2. Boys find reasons why they can’t. Men find ways they can.
Boys are the ones who’re focussing any
potential barriers that could possibly get in the way and finding ways to use them as an excuse not to push themselves outside their comfort zone:
“Hot women get approached all the time…”
“I don’t have enough information…”
“I’m not ready yet…”
And if there’s nothing to blame, they create barriers:
“It’s too early / close to lunch / dark / late / sunny…”
“I don’t have enough time…”
“There’s too many people…”
Men are the ones that are finding ways to take action, despite the barriers in their way. They’re the ones finding ways to lean over their edge and push their boundaries, despite the obstacles that they encounter:
“I’ll wake up half an hour earlier.”
“I’ll save for a week.”
“I’ll just tell her to take her earphones out.”
Men know that if they’re ever going to create the life they want, they have to make it happen and so get off their arse and do it.
3. Boys do what’s easy. Men do what’s right.
Boys always look for the easy way out. Boys are so afraid of hard work that they look for the effort-free solution that means they can get out of work with the least amount of pain and exertion.
Boys want the 5 minute, magic bullet, quick fix solution that will give them instant results without breaking a sweat that most people work a life time to achieve.
Men look for the ‘right’ solution, regardless of how hard it is. They’re not looking to get away with doing as little as possible, they wan to do what’s right, irrespective of the amount of effort they have to put in.
Men want the morally sound, honest, authentic solution that gives them real, long term results, equivalent to the amount of work they put in.
Men know that every action they take contributes to the kind of world they live in and as they want to live in a world where people do what’s right, they set the example.
4. Boys blame other people for what they contributed. Men take responsibility for what they contributed.
Boys focus externally on what other people contributed to their problems and how they should have acted differently. Instead of looking at how they created the situation and what they contributed, they try to avoid all responsibility and turn their focus outwards to find someone or something to blame.
“She shouldn’t have been rude to me. What a bitch!”
“You shouldn’t have given me so much work to do.”
“It failed because no-one would give me a chance.”
Men focus internally on what they contributed and what they could have done different next time. They acknowledge that there are many different elements that contribute to any outcome and any situation, but are also consciously aware that blaming anyone or anything else is never going to help them build the life they want,.
“I shouldn’t have approached her because she clearly didn’t want to
talk to people.”
“I should have managed my time better.”
“I needed to make my offer more appealing.”
Men know that they only way to ever create the life they want is to focus on what they create and so maintain their focus there.
5. Boys run away from pain. Men move towards pleasure.
Boys spend their time scanning their world for potential problems or sources of pain and fear and run away from them.
“She could reject me so I won’t approach.”
“I might fail so I won’t try.”
“They might judge me so I won’t express myself.”
Men spend their time looking for ways they can experience what they want and move towards them.
“I could connect with her so I’m going to approach.”
“I could learn something new so I’m going to try.”
“I love feeling free so I’m going to express myself.”
Men know the best life you can ever hope to achieve by running away from pain is neutrality and so consciously focus on fulfilling their deep desires.
6. Boys claim they don’t have what they want because the world isn’t fair. Men just go after what they want.
Boys sit around claiming that they’re had it tougher / harder than everyone else and that the world has treated the differently through no fault of their own. Boys take the victim mentality and assign responsibility for their life situation to people, outcomes, and events outside their control.
“I didn’t have a father to teach me…”
“I’m not tall enough…”
“I didn’t get success when I was younger…”
Men just focus on what they want and keep moving forward, regardless of how fair or unfair the world might appear.
“I didn’t have a father to teach me so I’m going to work it out for myself.”
“I might not be tall enough but I’m definitely going to be loud enough.”
“I didn’t have success when I was younger so I’m going to make sure I do now.”
Men know that fairness is an illusion and the world will continue to throw you curve balls and the only way you can ever have what you want is to get out and create it.
love ya man)
