I find it hard to muster that much sympathy for these guys when I read shit like how their 'wife' is more than half their age. What kind of delude, egoistical, selfish douchebag thinks a woman, with whom he probably even can't have a conversation, 30 years younger has fallen in love with him?
It's not just the old dudes. I've seen young guys get scammed out of every last cent. I've seen young guys get knifed by a crazy girlfriend.
And, I don't mark it down to the douchebaggery you refer to (though, in many cases it is exactly that).
I think for a lot of guys, both young and old, it comes down to never having scraped that low in the barrel before. They've never known people living that close to the edge.
Even to this day, some of the stories you hear sound unbelievable.
But, there are always warning signs! Always!
The worst part if when you see someone you know and the girl is just bad news on so many levels. You can see her rolling her eyes, flinching when he touches her, etc. He tells you stories about the relationship that you know are not normal (and he does too) and yet he thinks he's in love.
A few months later he's calling to meet up so he can cry in his beer about how much he's lost or how badly she screwed him over.
If I never get another one of those phone calls again it'll be too soon.
Yes, that kind of delusion really requires you to be an asshole of epic proportions and hence why most reasonable people living in Bangkok are reluctant to hang out with guys dating/married to bar girls.
Hmmmm . . . I would say that it's more accurate that guys don't have a huge problem with hanging out with friends who are married/dating bar girls. It's their girlfriends and-or wives who have a problem with it.
As I said before, generally Thais are both racist and classist. They have a hard enough time dealing with their maid from Isan let alone having to associate with bar girls.
These guys being scammed are not nice guys. They're self absorbed, egomaniac morons, who would rather believe a lie than face the fact they're losers. I do not feel sorry for them. How dumb do you have to be, to not just keep one of these bar girls as a mistress on tap. Why in the world would you want a girl with 6 years of education stinking up your place with some rotten fermented isaan fish, while sitting barefoot on the floor gossiping on your cell phone. Unless you're a similarly uneducated baffoon in your own country. Unfortunately, in countries without a nanny state, there are few laws in place to protect dumb people against their own stupidity. The very lack of restriction that gave these losers a hot bedpartner also ends up being their demise.
I think you're picking a stereotype of bar girls and a stereotype of guys who get scammed. And like all stereotypes, there's some truth but I think you're describing the extremes.
I think the danger in that is that:
a) Anybody who doesn't think they're an egotistical asshole thinks they have nothing to worry about.
b) Everybody thinks all they have to do is steer clear of bar girls and they've got a winner on their hands.
Both will get you in a lot of trouble. I've heard just as many horror stories with middle and upper class Thais as with bar girls. And part of that is because a lot of guys think, "Hey, she's got a university degree and comes from a good family so, I have nothing to worry about."
Yeah, right.
Sure, she might not leave footprints on your toilet seat but she can be just as conniving and diabolical as any bar girl (probably even more so since she actually has a brain).
I tend to view everyone based on their actions. Never let your guard down until that person has demonstrated beyond any reasonable doubt that they can be trusted. And even then, keep one eye on your wallet just in case.
Not that you need to be paranoid but most of these scams work off of playing to certain triggers. If you don't know jack about Thai culture you have no idea what's normal and what isn't so they take advantage of that fact.
The dregs of the western world and the bottom feeders of Thai society meet in Pattaya. They each get what they deserve. I detest Pattaya. It's an absolute shithole of moral bankruptcy. But it's what most western hedonist losers want. They don't understand that they're losing their mind until they end up in jail or dead. The only reason for me to go to Pattaya would be to hit on the Russian girls on holiday package. The ass-ugly Isaan girls I will not touch with 10 foot pole.
The guide to a nice Thailand stay is to just not get involved with Isaan girls. Pay them and be happy if you want to sex them, but never get involved in a relationship with one.
Could not agree more on Pattaya.
