Welcome to yet another lame inspirational thread. Some people are going to get what I mean in this post, others won't. Honestly, I won't be surprised if most don't really get it. But to those of you who do, I hope it serves some purpose...to inspire, to get you off your ass, to help you see more clearly.
I'm also looking forward to the "Well, that's all pretty obvious elime, isn't it?" posts. Screw off, I'm thinking out loud.
Moving right along.
As you noticed when you clicked this thread, the title is "You don't have to be a pussy."
I'm serious.
Stop taking shit from people. You don't have to.
The more I interact with people, the more I realize that there are two types. Of course there are more, but two are the focus for this post. There are predators and there are doormats. Let me define these two classes as I see them:
Predator: You see opportunities and you take them. You don't hesitate to benefit yourself. This does not mean you're an inherently "bad" person - it just means you have your priorities straight. To be a predator is not to be treacherous, disloyal, or even hedonistic. Predators run in packs. You know that your friends/allies are also predators, so a mutual respect grows. There is a balance of give and take between predators.
Doormat: You're the giver. The bitch. Your relationships feel empty, because you know deep down that they're only there to use you. There is no reciprocation. Why? Because there doesn't have to be. You'll gladly hand over what you have for some reason or another (a false sense of guilt or obligation, the 'kindness of your heart,' and other pussy internal rationalizing), and you won't be surprised when gratitude is scarce - you're used to it.
So, I'm positive there are some people reading this who can relate to the doormat position. Everyone's been there. You've been there. I've been there. Probably for most of my life.
How many times have you been in a situation where you thought to yourself, "This just doesn't feel right," but continued on? Chances are high that you were a doormat. Have you ever, for example, loaned money to someone and never been paid back? How many times have you been in relationships (friends and significant others) where you're always, inevitably, the primary "giver"? Either materially, financially, emotionally, or even in the sense of "little favors"? Probably a lot. You know why these people get away with it: they don't respect you. And why should they? You let it happen, often willingly.
I also know that there are many of you that have never really been in that position. That's fantastic, consider yourself lucky, intelligent, and in general a step ahead of everyone else.
But this message is for the doormats. It's time to stop being a pussy, stop taking shit from people, and start changing things. Start looking out for yourself. Your real relationships can and ultimately will only be with others who respect you. So get a fucking spine and stop being a giver, a bitch. You're not Santa Claus anymore.
This period of growth isn't easy. I wager a lot of people can't handle it. Because if you start growing some balls, all the friends/family/significant others you have will react. They're either going to move on to their next host (being the parasites they are) or, ideally, they're going to actually begin to respect you. Either way, you're going to learn a lot about yourself and the people you surround yourself with. If you lose some "friends" in the process, you didn't actually lose anything. You removed a negative element from your environment.
This doesn't mean to become a miser or a shitty, selfish person. It means accepting reality and growing up. I know many "predator" types that are more giving than any doormat could be - the difference is that when they give, the recipients respect them for it. The gratitude is genuine.
What does this mean in the context of business or marketing?
We're all here because we either run our own businesses (or want to be). Even if you don't run your own business and don't desire to, you're still here because you're obviously not content with the mainstream method of economical survival in some way or another.
Being a doormat in your personal relationships is one thing. The worst that can happen (in all but extreme cases) is that you'll just be a miserable prick and have a gaping void in your tainted soul (/emo).
Being a doormat in business, however, is quite different. You'll never succeed if you let people step on you. Period. I don't know how to explain it further.
I'm a pretty young guy. I don't know much, and in the grand scheme of things I'm still a noob. However, I do make my living online now, and I attribute 90% of that success to the relationships I've developed over the past year. Sometimes I marvel at how mutually beneficial and enjoyable these relationships are.
If, for some reason, every single one of those relationships dissolved overnight, would I still be able to support myself? Yes.
If everyone I'm talking about suddenly lost all of their contacts, would they? Yes.
That's where being able to stand for yourself comes into play. In this situation, everyone can respect one another. You're not in the relationship because you have to be or need to be - you're in it because it's mutually beneficial (often in more than just a financial/business sense).
In conclusion.
So that's it. Stop being a pussy. If your friends, wife, girlfriend, family, business partners etc. are stepping all over you - stop it. Don't take that shit anymore. Get out of your comfortable little rut. You'll feel better. Your business will thrive because of it.
I'm also looking forward to the "Well, that's all pretty obvious elime, isn't it?" posts. Screw off, I'm thinking out loud.
Moving right along.
As you noticed when you clicked this thread, the title is "You don't have to be a pussy."
I'm serious.
Stop taking shit from people. You don't have to.
The more I interact with people, the more I realize that there are two types. Of course there are more, but two are the focus for this post. There are predators and there are doormats. Let me define these two classes as I see them:
Predator: You see opportunities and you take them. You don't hesitate to benefit yourself. This does not mean you're an inherently "bad" person - it just means you have your priorities straight. To be a predator is not to be treacherous, disloyal, or even hedonistic. Predators run in packs. You know that your friends/allies are also predators, so a mutual respect grows. There is a balance of give and take between predators.
Doormat: You're the giver. The bitch. Your relationships feel empty, because you know deep down that they're only there to use you. There is no reciprocation. Why? Because there doesn't have to be. You'll gladly hand over what you have for some reason or another (a false sense of guilt or obligation, the 'kindness of your heart,' and other pussy internal rationalizing), and you won't be surprised when gratitude is scarce - you're used to it.
So, I'm positive there are some people reading this who can relate to the doormat position. Everyone's been there. You've been there. I've been there. Probably for most of my life.
How many times have you been in a situation where you thought to yourself, "This just doesn't feel right," but continued on? Chances are high that you were a doormat. Have you ever, for example, loaned money to someone and never been paid back? How many times have you been in relationships (friends and significant others) where you're always, inevitably, the primary "giver"? Either materially, financially, emotionally, or even in the sense of "little favors"? Probably a lot. You know why these people get away with it: they don't respect you. And why should they? You let it happen, often willingly.
I also know that there are many of you that have never really been in that position. That's fantastic, consider yourself lucky, intelligent, and in general a step ahead of everyone else.
But this message is for the doormats. It's time to stop being a pussy, stop taking shit from people, and start changing things. Start looking out for yourself. Your real relationships can and ultimately will only be with others who respect you. So get a fucking spine and stop being a giver, a bitch. You're not Santa Claus anymore.
This period of growth isn't easy. I wager a lot of people can't handle it. Because if you start growing some balls, all the friends/family/significant others you have will react. They're either going to move on to their next host (being the parasites they are) or, ideally, they're going to actually begin to respect you. Either way, you're going to learn a lot about yourself and the people you surround yourself with. If you lose some "friends" in the process, you didn't actually lose anything. You removed a negative element from your environment.
This doesn't mean to become a miser or a shitty, selfish person. It means accepting reality and growing up. I know many "predator" types that are more giving than any doormat could be - the difference is that when they give, the recipients respect them for it. The gratitude is genuine.
What does this mean in the context of business or marketing?
We're all here because we either run our own businesses (or want to be). Even if you don't run your own business and don't desire to, you're still here because you're obviously not content with the mainstream method of economical survival in some way or another.
Being a doormat in your personal relationships is one thing. The worst that can happen (in all but extreme cases) is that you'll just be a miserable prick and have a gaping void in your tainted soul (/emo).
Being a doormat in business, however, is quite different. You'll never succeed if you let people step on you. Period. I don't know how to explain it further.
I'm a pretty young guy. I don't know much, and in the grand scheme of things I'm still a noob. However, I do make my living online now, and I attribute 90% of that success to the relationships I've developed over the past year. Sometimes I marvel at how mutually beneficial and enjoyable these relationships are.
If, for some reason, every single one of those relationships dissolved overnight, would I still be able to support myself? Yes.
If everyone I'm talking about suddenly lost all of their contacts, would they? Yes.
That's where being able to stand for yourself comes into play. In this situation, everyone can respect one another. You're not in the relationship because you have to be or need to be - you're in it because it's mutually beneficial (often in more than just a financial/business sense).
In conclusion.
So that's it. Stop being a pussy. If your friends, wife, girlfriend, family, business partners etc. are stepping all over you - stop it. Don't take that shit anymore. Get out of your comfortable little rut. You'll feel better. Your business will thrive because of it.
