Ever wonder if people like you for what you can do for them?

BlueYonder

BlueYonder

Flaming panties
Aug 13, 2008
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New York Metro
A writer friend I know for many years has a Wordpress-hosted blog that she's been keeping up with quality content for about 6 years. I had a look at it, and told her it's a PR5 authority site.

She didn't know what that meant, so I explained the basics of page rank, authority sites, SEO, developing domains, online branding, giving feedback on templates she liked, blah blah blah. I sent approximately 25 emails to help out, being that she wants to develop her online presence.

Then when I mentioned briefly what I'm doing, which is running a thriving business in the middle of a horrible recession, and asked what she thinks of my little enterprise - the emails stopped.

It feels like all she was cared about was info relevant to her, and has no interest in what I'm doing or how I apply the info I told her to my work. I suppose I'm guilty of being overly available and accommodating.

Maybe she was using me for info, or maybe not, but I certainly let her. Perhaps if I were writing a novel, and not online ads for cash, she'd be interested in my work. :(

Do you ever feel that people are using you for info? If I wanted to be nasty I could drop links at her site without telling her why it matters.
 


Someones being used.

or maybe you came off as cocky. Either way thats no way to impress a chick. She doesn't care about your internet l33t skills. If you were trying to get with her you probably blew your chances.
 
erifdekciw said:
Someones being used.

or maybe you came off as cocky. Either way thats no way to impress a chick. She doesn't care about your internet l33t skills. If you were trying to get with her you probably blew your chances.
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I am a chick, and she's a chick. It's not a sex thing; it's a helping out an old friend thing. The point was to help her promote her novels online, and I delivered the info.
 
Oh ok didn't know you were a chick. You were probably being used a little and when you asked her what she thought about your success she probably got a little jealous.
 
Everyone uses everyone in their life.

You wouldn't be her friend if you weren't getting something out of the deal. If whatever you're getting doesn't compensate you for whatever you're giving, you leave.

That's how it is with acquaintances, friends, lovers, spouses, kids, customers and business partners.
 
erifdekciw said:
Oh ok didn't know you were a chick. You were probably being used a little and when you asked her what she thought about your success she probably got a little jealous.
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Yes, no, maybe. She's actually a lot more successful, having published several novels and other really impressive stuff.

I was wondering if people look to members here as a source of info and then get dropped or whatever.

The knowledge we marketers have is really REALLY valuable. I know many people here know a lot more than me, but I know tons more than the civilians.

I'm just having a little rant.
 
Silly question.

This is the whole reason for superficiality, to make yourself look more important and useful to others.

Of course we 'use' people every single day whether we have mal intent or not. Even if its not monetary you're hang out with you best friend because of the joy, fun, stress relief they can provide you not just cause you think they're a cool person.

If you don't get what you need/want out of a person(whether its a good feeling or steeling a business model) and convince yourself that your not going to get it in the future then making an effort to communicate with that person is a waste of your time.
 
That she didn't answer you mail might have to do with lots of stuff. Is she your friend or someone you would want to be your friend? You made a big effort, kudos for that. Maybe it should not have gone to someone who is unappreciative.

Observe that people who accomplish a lot of stuff take short cuts by using other people. Not all are polity enough to pay you.

Then again, maybe she just recieved your mail at a bad time and since its 20 minutes to write a mail like that its getting pushed down the mailqueue. Or things are really shit for her in some aspect and she doesnt want to play compare just now. Or over 9000 other things.

Be well
 
I was in such situation quite often. I would stop communication for now. Don't expect anything but wait.
 
It's a problem if it's recurring and you're getting "used" often.

If it's an isolated you're probably not being used.
 
BlueYonder said:
A writer friend I know for many years has a Wordpress-hosted blog that she's been keeping up with quality content for about 6 years. I had a look at it, and told her it's a PR5 authority site.

She didn't know what that meant, so I explained the basics of page rank, authority sites, SEO, developing domains, online branding, giving feedback on templates she liked, blah blah blah. I sent approximately 25 emails to help out, being that she wants to develop her online presence.

Then when I mentioned briefly what I'm doing, which is running a thriving business in the middle of a horrible recession, and asked what she thinks of my little enterprise - the emails stopped.

It feels like all she was cared about was info relevant to her, and has no interest in what I'm doing or how I apply the info I told her to my work. I suppose I'm guilty of being overly available and accommodating.

Maybe she was using me for info, or maybe not, but I certainly let her. Perhaps if I were writing a novel, and not online ads for cash, she'd be interested in my work. :(

Do you ever feel that people are using you for info? If I wanted to be nasty I could drop links at her site without telling her why it matters.
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I look at it like this. If I found out someone used me, its a good thing. Because I found out sooner than later that I didn't want to be friends with that person.

Bassicly, fuck her, shes a peice of shit :)
 
or maybe she just doesnt care about all that nerdy internet shit... she just likes to update her blog. she doesnt care what her PR is or how many links she gets
 
being a total cunt to everyone sorts out your real friends from those who just want shit from you and saves a lot of time wasting with idiots
 
BlueYonder said:
It feels like all she was cared about was info relevant to her, and has no interest in what I'm doing or how I apply the info I told her to my work.
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I'm not surprised. From experience I can say that most women born and raised in America are exactly like what you have explained - pretty damn self absorbed.
 
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^BlueYonder
 
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