Two guys are hiking in the desert when one is bitten on the ass by a rattlesnake. The other guy takes out his cell phone and calls 911.
Operator: 911. What's your emergency?
Guy #2: Hey, me and my buddy are out in the desert and my friend's been bit by a rattlesnake. I don't know what to do!
Operator: Ok, don't worry, he'll be fine. Just do the following: Take a knife. Cut an 'X' where the bite is. Then suck out the poison, and spit it out.
Guy #2: Ok, thanks.
After hanging up his phone, his friend turns to him anxiously.
Guy #1: Well, what'd he say?!
Guy #2: He says you're gonna die.