psychology behind platonic one way friendship

Osmosis

Osmosis

New member
Sep 21, 2012
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Ohio
Hey Guys:

I know what i have to do.. And I just want to be friends. BUT.. Girl wants to talk on the phone all nite, and I have once, but other than that, doesnt want to come and visit. I must go to her house, or her friends house. Ok, thats cool for a minute but after a while i had to chalk it up as a loss, If you wanna talk on the phone, see me at the club, see me at a friends house.. But dont want to come and see me.

I feel like mr. creeper here. If we both agreed platonic.. But you lead me on other wise to think you wanna meet my kids and stuff.. but im making all the effort.. gotta let her go

but what I'd like to know is whats the psychology behind her thinking? this incident has never happened to me before. this is a first
 
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You have become her puppy dog, her validation on tap, her accessory to show to friends. In other words, you've been friendzoned.
 
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You asked for her reasoning?

As a girl, I see you as a pushover! You're easy!

Maybe I wanted to be friends with you, but now you're kind of being a creeper, and I want to keep my distance without being mean to you. If I just say "look, I'm not interested in you any more than friendship" you're going to whine to all our friends that I'm a frigid bitch and tell a bunch of forum-goers that it wasn't your fault.

You're willing to talk to me when I want to bitch all night about whatever dumb thing is bothering me, and you'll tell me I was totally right.

You'll come over, or meet up with me, or meet me when we go out. I don't have to take time out of my day to come see you, or even spend gas to drive over to your house.

I can keep you on the backburner forever because you'll always be there to tell me I'm pretty when some other, more adventurous man won't take my bullcrap. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, you're there to soothe my insecurities. When we get in a fight, you'll tell me I'm right. I'll forever think of you as a friend, man, a "good listener", and if I do break down and think "dating you wouldn't be so bad" I'll always think I settled.

Just let her go. You obviously want more from her because you're whining to us about it. She'll have plenty of other guys to play the "platonic friend".
 
JessicaEsrig said:
You asked for her reasoning?

As a girl, I see you as a pushover! You're easy!

Maybe I wanted to be friends with you, but now you're kind of being a creeper, and I want to keep my distance without being mean to you. If I just say "look, I'm not interested in you any more than friendship" you're going to whine to all our friends that I'm a frigid bitch and tell a bunch of forum-goers that it wasn't your fault.

You're willing to talk to me when I want to bitch all night about whatever dumb thing is bothering me, and you'll tell me I was totally right.

You'll come over, or meet up with me, or meet me when we go out. I don't have to take time out of my day to come see you, or even spend gas to drive over to your house.

I can keep you on the backburner forever because you'll always be there to tell me I'm pretty when some other, more adventurous man won't take my bullcrap. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, you're there to soothe my insecurities. When we get in a fight, you'll tell me I'm right. I'll forever think of you as a friend, man, a "good listener", and if I do break down and think "dating you wouldn't be so bad" I'll always think I settled.

Just let her go. You obviously want more from her because you're whining to us about it. She'll have plenty of other guys to play the "platonic friend".
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THIS.
 
I was dating a girl I really liked, but was being pushed into the friend zone.

So we were out and I bought her a rose and told her this shit has to end. Then a guy started to hit on her and I told him to get lost. He bit the head off the rose. I beat the crap out of him in about 10 seconds. Then joked with the bouncer who saw the whole thing as he escorted us out the door.

She has been my wife for the past 18 years...

tldr: Don't be a bitch... Show her you care, prove you mean it, and be willing to walk away if she does not agree.
 
JessicaEsrig said:
You asked for her reasoning?

As a girl, I see you as a pushover! You're easy!

Maybe I wanted to be friends with you, but now you're kind of being a creeper, and I want to keep my distance without being mean to you. If I just say "look, I'm not interested in you any more than friendship" you're going to whine to all our friends that I'm a frigid bitch and tell a bunch of forum-goers that it wasn't your fault.

You're willing to talk to me when I want to bitch all night about whatever dumb thing is bothering me, and you'll tell me I was totally right.

You'll come over, or meet up with me, or meet me when we go out. I don't have to take time out of my day to come see you, or even spend gas to drive over to your house.

I can keep you on the backburner forever because you'll always be there to tell me I'm pretty when some other, more adventurous man won't take my bullcrap. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, you're there to soothe my insecurities. When we get in a fight, you'll tell me I'm right. I'll forever think of you as a friend, man, a "good listener", and if I do break down and think "dating you wouldn't be so bad" I'll always think I settled.

Just let her go. You obviously want more from her because you're whining to us about it. She'll have plenty of other guys to play the "platonic friend".
Click to expand...

Shut the fuck up, when we want your opinion we'll ask for it. Don't hold your breath.

@OP, less beta male, more ^^^^.
 
I find the less I care, the better I do. Just constantly hit on girls and eventually you'll have a few successes. Over time you can improve your conversion rate with experience but the main starting point is just getting out there.

Would you spend a year on a website trying to make one visitor convert or would you build a small amount of traffic to start and THEN try and improve conversions?
 
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