Staying faithful..

L

lose lose win

gnothi seauton
Aug 3, 2011
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For all of you married guys or guys with serious long term girlfriends... How do you stay faithful? It's a serious problem for me, and honestly, I've NEVER been able to do it. Never married, but serious long term girlfriends that I came close to marrying a couple of times but just couldn't and I always cheated. The time I came closest to marriage I felt completely panicked and just could not commit to it... and she was a faithful and beautiful girl that many men would love to have as a wife.

This is not a troll thread.. I seriously do not understand how I could mentally commit to only sleeping with ONE girl for the rest of my LIFE. I mean.. I love females too much. Just flirting with one in the donut shop or wherever the fuck is enough to make me mentally stray. I understand the value of a good consistent partner that backs you and supports you no matter what, and I see these ultra successful men being seemingly happily married and the combination of those two things makes me think I should start considering settling down at age 31.. but fuck, what is better than a hot 23 year old new girlfriend? I love meeting new and interesting women/girls and having sex with them, and getting to know there different personalities... and relationships inevitably get stale and thus boring. The opposite of happiness is boredom.. I just don't see myself giving up the ability to participate in the "chase" even though I know it isn't always fulfilling...it's exciting. Variety is the spice of life right? It's literally in my DNA to procreate with as many females is possible... that's a pretty serious urge to suppress for an entire lifetime.

Do you guys not feel like a fucking killer whale in a tank at Sea World with your dorsal fin all flopped over and shit? That's exactly how I feel in those situations, but everyone around me is diving right in without the slightest hesitation.
 


Never even a question.
Seriously, this is one of the cornerstones of my personal ethics.

No cheating. Ever.

::emp::
 
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your not doing anything wrong. cheat on them before they cheat on you is the best relationship advice I've ever gotten.
 
lose lose win said:
For all of you married guys or guys with serious long term girlfriends... How do you stay faithful? It's a serious problem for me, and honestly, I've NEVER been able to do it. Never married, but serious long term girlfriends that I came close to marrying a couple of times but just couldn't and I always cheated. The time I came closest to marriage I felt completely panicked and just could not commit to it... and she was a faithful and beautiful girl that many men would love to have as a wife.

This is not a troll thread.. I seriously do not understand how I could mentally commit to only sleeping with ONE girl for the rest of my LIFE. I mean.. I love females too much. Just flirting with one in the donut shop or wherever the fuck is enough to make me mentally stray. I understand the value of a good consistent partner that backs you and supports you no matter what, and I see these ultra successful men being seemingly happily married and the combination of those two things makes me think I should start considering settling down at age 31.. but fuck, what is better than a hot 23 year old new girlfriend? I love meeting new and interesting women/girls and having sex with them, and getting to know there different personalities... and relationships inevitably get stale and thus boring. The opposite of happiness is boredom.. I just don't see myself giving up the ability to participate in the "chase" even though I know it isn't always fulfilling...it's exciting. Variety is the spice of life right? It's literally in my DNA to procreate with as many females is possible... that's a pretty serious urge to suppress for an entire lifetime.

Do you guys not feel like a fucking killer whale in a tank at Sea World with your dorsal fin all flopped over and shit? That's exactly how I feel in those situations, but everyone around me is diving right in without the slightest hesitation.
Click to expand...

What need are you meeting when you cheat?

No it's not sex because you can get sex without having to cheat.

For most guys its social power.
 
I know a guy with the same problem
















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Ar Scion said:
What need are you meeting when you cheat?

No it's not sex because you can get sex without having to cheat.

For most guys its social power.
Click to expand...

For most guys it's probably boredom. The passion has gone and replaced with same ol, same ol. It's so common there's even a term for it called the seven year itch. Variety is the spice of life, monogamy is boredom.
 
I'll let you in on the secret.

Most people aren't faithful. They just say they are. That's why God invented business trips.
 
you just need to feed your ego with constant attention from people you think are valuable (hot females) - otherwise you think you will suffer.

its just narcissism

nothing wrong with that when you're straight up about it and not lying to yourself and the girls.
 
Hello friend,

I think marriage no is for everyone. Just because most other people do it no mean you have to do it to.

Same with have children. Just because see other have children it no mean you need have children to. If no went responbiity of be parent then no have children.

If want just went sex lot different women until die or old and penis no work it okay. If think marry just one women and only sex her very boring and horrible then no should do.

So no should marry and have children just because you see everyone else do and expect by society. Should marry and have children because you want to.

Good luck bro
 
women are very very enticing and I know what you mean when you say you like variety.

however i think its a combination of things. If you were raised with the belief that sex was for marriage then you probably did a good job to supress those sexual desires at an early age. obviously you havent.

but like any drug or addiction, once you get a taste and devulge, its harder to change or go back.

I for one was never a "playa" in my young age so sex did not really come easy for me nor was I actively persuing the physicality of it (okay i masturbated alot, am fat n ugly and thats why I feel at home in this forum)

but yeah now that im married I dont really have the urge to screw every fine ass that walks down the halls of my office bldg. I have no problem being faithful to my wife but as a man I cant deny having a wondering eye, I just tell myself to control it.

on the other hand I have a brother that was raised the same values as me but pussy came easy for him in high school and he never restrained. now in his 30's hes still very promiscuous and cant settle down, he is a victim to his own desires.
 
First, your GF is PROBABLY NOT faithful.

Get this, most of the divorce in US is initiated by women.

Women cheat as much as men do.

75% of people cheat. What makes you think yours wont?

Once you have at least entertained the possibility that your future wife could and might cheat on you...THEN you will have a clearer mind.
 
I don't view it as a cheating issue but as a trust issue. A long term relationship, if you really think about it, isn't anything else than two people trusting each others to be monogamous.

So if you can't manage your part of the bargain then why are you in a relationship in the first place?
 
lose lose win said:
I love meeting new and interesting women/girls and having sex with them, and getting to know there different personalities... and relationships inevitably get stale and thus boring. The opposite of happiness is boredom.. I just don't see myself giving up the ability to participate in the "chase" even though I know it isn't always fulfilling...it's exciting.
Click to expand...
You aren't marriage material. You need to make this clear to any girl after your one-night-stands.

I'm the opposite. I hate the chase. I hate the bar scene. I hate dating in general. Been together with my wife for 13 years and married for nearly 10. I love my life, I love my kids, and wouldn't trade it for the world. My family is also used to the high/lows that this business brings.
 
No reason to settle down unless you really want to. I don't even get why people have relationships with people they don't want to have kids with. What if you meet someone better while in that relationship?

I like to take things day by day, if I want to spend time with a person that day then I do, if not, well then I don't. If you wake up every morning wanting to spend time with a person (and that person feels the same), I guess then you are in a relationship. But it should only last as long as both feel that way.

Of course it gets more complicated when you want kids. I'll worry about that when I get older. Also take what I write with a grain of salt as I am still a young fella and know that my views on that will probably change when I get older.
 
well sounds like either you're just not the settling type or you haven't reached that stage yet. either way don't fuck around when in a relationship because that's just being stupid and immature.
 
I know exactly how you feel dude. Although I don't always cheat and CAN control it, I have a fucking HARD time dealing with monogamy.

I typically find myself in a relationship with a really cool girl that I get along with really well. Shell be beautiful, funny, cute, entertaining, caring... Just an awesome girl. But, I can't stop looking at a few dozen girls a day and thinking to myself "Christ I would fuck the hell out of her!"

It's not even a "want" as much as a need.

The problem is its never emotional! I'll be perfectly happy with my girl, and simply want to experience the body of others. Like if I lived in a perfect world, I could stay with the woman I care about and just go out every once in awhile and get nasty with a random hottie and then go right back to my normal life.

I've never figured out a solution really... And it blows because I don't want to leave a relationship for someone else. I just really want them for a night.
 
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