Uh.. I asked me g/f to marry me and she broke up with me
- Thread starter BigWill
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Shit dude, that's brutal.
Keep your head up though man. It hurts know, and it probably will for a while, but it won't forever. Like Jon said, stay away from booze and drugs, especially if there's a cell phone handy, and just let it be. Take this time to do a bit of learning and growing yourself.
Take care bud.
Keep your head up though man. It hurts know, and it probably will for a while, but it won't forever. Like Jon said, stay away from booze and drugs, especially if there's a cell phone handy, and just let it be. Take this time to do a bit of learning and growing yourself.
Take care bud.
This is when you are supposed to fuck her best friend. It will make you feel better and piss her off at the same time. 
Barman has an almost 99% probability in being correct. Sorry to hear it though.
The reality is women don't just "break up" or "need to start a new chapter" especially in a long term relationship without there already being a new chapter in their lives (ie. a dude).
The most likely scenario is that BigWill was plan B for about a year while she was trying several new chapters.
Yeah, women can be complete heartless cunts. All I have for you is don't do yourself a disservice and demand to find out what dick head stole her away from you, just remember this poor guys dick wasn't forced into her, she was open to it.
If you turn stalker and start demanding all sorts of info, the reality is it will never, ever be the same if by some miracle you get her back. And the alternative is that you get her new guys name and beat the shit out of him, which would again, only put you at risk for a world of hurt, legally and otherwise.
Reality is, if she really doesn't want you, she doesn't and it fucking sucks. You can't force her to although some psycho nut jobs seem to go the route of "if I can't have you, no one will.." ...like um, yeah, that's really going to make her want you more
Good luck.
BTW, I speak from *direct* experience in this, although, luckily I had no intention of marry my ex-, nearly 10 years with her. And my life is TONS better for it now. Oh and she's not emptying my bank accounts now either. Woot!
What a prophet .. women truly do suck. Experience here too, only this shit came up after marriage & kids .. let me tell you, it makes life very difficult every fucking day. Be thankful it's happening now and not past the point of no return.
Women need unconditional love, men need unconditional respect. If you gave her that (9 years sounds like it) then you've done your part and she is the evil one. But what (or who) she did is really not that important. The truth is that you will be better off without the extra baggage. Move elsewhere, get rid of pictures & pick yourself back up. Not much else you can do except revenge, but that's not always as gratifying as it appears. And it's very short lived.
Best advice, throw yourself into work. Chicks dig a big bank account.
Take a few to get over it then have the time of your life as a single person. Nothing will get under her skin more. Afterall, you are being forced to turn a chapter in your life too, may as well be from a porno mag.
Didn't say I'm sorry to hear you are in that situation with the last post, wanted to do that because I know it hurts.
wrong, bad advice .... That's usually part of a trap.
Now if you just happen to show up at her favorite oasis when she's toe-up and take her home and piss all over her face, that's your call. The bottom line is take it out on her, not other people.
This is when you are supposed to fuck her best friend. It will make you feel better and piss her off at the same time.
wrong, bad advice .... That's usually part of a trap.
Now if you just happen to show up at her favorite oasis when she's toe-up and take her home and piss all over her face, that's your call. The bottom line is take it out on her, not other people.
WTF? I'm realy sorry Will. I've gone through something kindof similar with my girlfriend I've been with for 6 years. Though I didn't ask her to marry me yet (she's almost 20, I'm 22, so too young i think), she broke up with me a couple times because she felt like she needed to see what else was out there or she'd regret it later..
But then I found out she really did it because she has deep-rooted trust issues and she was so scared about how sad she'd be if I left her, that she broke up with me first. hah. big fail.
So my situation isn't too similar to yours but we've both been with our girls through thick and thin, and we're both in with the family, etc.. So I know it's a HUGE shock to you.
Please try to not to take it personally man. 99% of girls have no idea what they want because they don't think rationally... they think based on whims and emotions.
GO WORK OUT!!!
RossTraining - Bridging The Gap Between Ordinary and Extraordinary Welcome to CrossFit: Forging Elite Fitness You will feel so much better!
But then I found out she really did it because she has deep-rooted trust issues and she was so scared about how sad she'd be if I left her, that she broke up with me first. hah. big fail.
So my situation isn't too similar to yours but we've both been with our girls through thick and thin, and we're both in with the family, etc.. So I know it's a HUGE shock to you.
Please try to not to take it personally man. 99% of girls have no idea what they want because they don't think rationally... they think based on whims and emotions.
GO WORK OUT!!!
RossTraining - Bridging The Gap Between Ordinary and Extraordinary Welcome to CrossFit: Forging Elite Fitness You will feel so much better!So I posted about my g/f in the other thread.. well. Last night I asked her to marry me. She gave me some long speach about how she has to start a new chapter in her life. One where she can grow as a person.. ALONE. She said she has wanted to say something for the past year or so.
This is fucked up. We have been together 9 years. Lived together for 7 years. She is my fucking world, I love her so much. Im super close to her family too, her dad was really happy when I told him I was going to ask her.
I don't know what to do
just had to vent
What the fuck are you doing dating some chick for 9 years. Sounds like she didn't have the balls to tell you to fuck off because you didn't have the balls to ask her to marry you 5-7 years ago.
Either that or you started dating to young and she feels she hasn't experienced life enough. AKA wants some other dick. It's really a good thing that she didn't say yes I'll marry you and then still want to experience those things. Because then you would have gotten married ( aka blown a load of cash ) and then have to get divorce as she's hooking up with some fresh young blood, maybe 2 or 3 at a time.
She did you a favor. And you need to stop being a pussy and when you think you want to marry some girl don't wait 9 god damn years to ask her. 9 years of dating == relationship not progressing and when a girl sees a relationship as not progressing she see's it as dead or dying.
It sucks man and you probably don't want to hear what I said above but as normal I give the bottom-line. Be miserable for a while that's what life's about. You'll find someone better in the end. I know it's hard to see through the fog and haze now but I have a birds eye view and can tell you honestly it's better on the other side.
I used to be a motivational speak for Tony Robbins ( I know go figure ) but people used to complain about being fired from a company that they worked at for years. But in reality some times that's the best thing for them. It makes you grow and that's what life is about.
Either that or you started dating to young and she feels she hasn't experienced life enough. AKA wants some other dick. It's really a good thing that she didn't say yes I'll marry you and then still want to experience those things. Because then you would have gotten married ( aka blown a load of cash ) and then have to get divorce as she's hooking up with some fresh young blood, maybe 2 or 3 at a time.
She did you a favor. And you need to stop being a pussy and when you think you want to marry some girl don't wait 9 god damn years to ask her. 9 years of dating == relationship not progressing and when a girl sees a relationship as not progressing she see's it as dead or dying.
It sucks man and you probably don't want to hear what I said above but as normal I give the bottom-line. Be miserable for a while that's what life's about. You'll find someone better in the end. I know it's hard to see through the fog and haze now but I have a birds eye view and can tell you honestly it's better on the other side.
I used to be a motivational speak for Tony Robbins ( I know go figure ) but people used to complain about being fired from a company that they worked at for years. But in reality some times that's the best thing for them. It makes you grow and that's what life is about.
When one door closes another one opens.
Life would be boring if everything went according to plan.
I feel for ya though. You finally pop the question and she stomps on you. Damn. I do think there is a window of opportunity though with long term relationships and getting married or not. I think it's about 3 to 5 years for younger people and 2-3 years for old fogeys. If no marriage question has been asked within those timeframes, then it's not meant to be. Also, if it took you that long to pop the question, then odds are you were never that into it either and only did it because secretly you knew the end was near. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know for sure, but I'm guessing after about 5 years and no proposal, she started having small doubts. Then as each year passed the doubts would grow larger and larger and then she'd get to the point where she needed to feel wanted by someone so she probably started cheating.
Still it blows and I do feel for ya...and i'm sure the last thing you need is another jackass on a forum to analyse your relationship, but, look at the bright side, there's no kids involved and you're not a divorcee...
Life would be boring if everything went according to plan.
I feel for ya though. You finally pop the question and she stomps on you. Damn. I do think there is a window of opportunity though with long term relationships and getting married or not. I think it's about 3 to 5 years for younger people and 2-3 years for old fogeys. If no marriage question has been asked within those timeframes, then it's not meant to be. Also, if it took you that long to pop the question, then odds are you were never that into it either and only did it because secretly you knew the end was near. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know for sure, but I'm guessing after about 5 years and no proposal, she started having small doubts. Then as each year passed the doubts would grow larger and larger and then she'd get to the point where she needed to feel wanted by someone so she probably started cheating.
Still it blows and I do feel for ya...and i'm sure the last thing you need is another jackass on a forum to analyse your relationship, but, look at the bright side, there's no kids involved and you're not a divorcee...
I'm more the type of person who would get pissed and say "If you have been unhappy for the last year, why didn't you say anything? You have wasted the last year of my life."
Kinda of a jerky thing to say, but if she had already decided a year ago she didn't want to be with me then don't waste my time. Let me be with someone that could go somewhere in a relationship....
Sorry to hear it, man.
Kinda of a jerky thing to say, but if she had already decided a year ago she didn't want to be with me then don't waste my time. Let me be with someone that could go somewhere in a relationship....
Sorry to hear it, man.
Girls feel, Guys think.
Unless there was something really building up and she did not have "balls" to tell you. In which the wood was rotten from the inside. Where there is nothing you can do and it was inevitable.
Otherwise, give her space. Act like: yes, i love you, but i respect your choice. Although it might HURT like there is no tomorrow. Act pragmatic and mature.
Chances are, she will realize within weeks or months that it was a mistake and come back. You know the saying: you dont know what u had until you lost it. And ther other say: if you love someone, you have to let them go. If they come back. They re yours foever.
Dont despair, Focuns on Aff marketing to keep your mind off things. If you work as hard as you are hurt now. you ,ll make 2-3 millions in the next 3 months. ( dont foget to send me 10%, i ll PM you my paypal account )
If all else fails: Wht doesnt kill you, makes you stronger. Not ur hurt, but in a year you ll laugh.
HH
Unless there was something really building up and she did not have "balls" to tell you. In which the wood was rotten from the inside. Where there is nothing you can do and it was inevitable.
Otherwise, give her space. Act like: yes, i love you, but i respect your choice. Although it might HURT like there is no tomorrow. Act pragmatic and mature.
Chances are, she will realize within weeks or months that it was a mistake and come back. You know the saying: you dont know what u had until you lost it. And ther other say: if you love someone, you have to let them go. If they come back. They re yours foever.
Dont despair, Focuns on Aff marketing to keep your mind off things. If you work as hard as you are hurt now. you ,ll make 2-3 millions in the next 3 months. ( dont foget to send me 10%, i ll PM you my paypal account )
If all else fails: Wht doesnt kill you, makes you stronger. Not ur hurt, but in a year you ll laugh.
HH
Oh ffs. What a load of complete shite. If you mean let her go and fuck a bunch of other dicks, then take her back, um, yeah.. good strategy. That's just romantic novel/movie drivel dreamed up to make the rejected feel better.
If she comes back, she may later again, think there is something better out there, why on earth would you want someone who feels like they have to settle for you because they couldn't find anyone better.
Please.
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