I got in the discussion with a lady friend about divorce when the Kobe story came up today. Basically, Kobe's wife is divorcing him due continued cheating, which she should have every right to. Now, they are predicting that Kobe's wife, Vanessa Lane Bryant (who will be keeping his last name as well) will be entitled to approximately 100 million dollars.
My reaction to this was an unequivocal WTF. Kobe didn't sign a prenup, sure, but is that really fair that Vanessa gets half of his sports empire? Where is the legal logic in this?
Fair enough, back in the day men really had no consequences for sleeping around and philandering. This is why now we have laws for paternity and abortion. In the 1800s, a woman who was divorced by her husband often had no education, or a way to make a living, so we devised a system that would prevent a good part of society from becoming homeless after their man left them.
However, this law hasn't changed at all to this day and has since turned into a way to screw men over. I'm not a men's rights activist and tend look down on those that carry that tone of discourse, but this is one area that I can agree on. Why is it that men must subsidize a woman's lifestyle as she lived with the main breadwinner? Shouldn't there be a cap, say a million dollars? Isn't that enough for a woman to survive on her own?
My lady friend's opinion was obviously different. The argument is as follows: marriage is a partnership and Kobe accomplished what he did because of his wife. She took care of the house and the kids while he played basketball. She is entitled to half because the "household" produced it. She also deserves the huge sum because Kobe cheated on her and the money is payment for the humiliation he wrought on her. She invested most of her most important years into Kobe and he just thew it all in the trash. Plus, it's his fault for not having a prenup.
I don't really buy this argument. Sure, Vanessa did most of the housework (oh wait, maids?) and raised the children, but to say she is responsible for even half of the success Kobe had as an athlete is absurd. This isn't really a logical argument so I can't really argue against it. How in the world does Vanessa's "work" in the marriage add up to 100 million?
And just because he cheated on her, that doesn't somehow magically entitle her anything special. Men cheat on women all the time, and vice versa. Sure, it sucks to be lead on for most of your adult life and to realize that the stud athlete you married is screwing young girls on the side, but can you really be surprised? Does that entitle you to damages?
A lot of people have joked that this is Kobe's fault for not getting a prenup. I feel like getting a prenup sets a bad tone for your marriage, because it essentially makes you admit that you don't trust your spouse 100%, which may be quite awkward. It also requires a steady & logical outlook with regards to marriage, which is not all too common when you're in love with someone enough to marry them. With that being said, judges have been known to toss out prenup agreements, so caveat emptor.
I'm not just ranting with regards to the Kobe situation. Many here are in the position or getting to the point where this will become an issue. It's almost impossible to structure your business, especially if you're simply running traffic, to protect yourself from divorce if you don't have a prenup. Make one wrong move with your spouse (or happen to marry a golddigger), and your internet marketing empire will go kaput. For those of you with SEO sites, you will probably have to sell your properties in order to fulfill the settlement.
Any thoughts?
PS: What's with women keeping the last names of their husband & engagement rings + other personal gifts. It strikes me kind of odd when women who have divorced famous men decided to keep the men's last name. The symbolism of you taking a man's last name means you are entering his family and becoming 'his'. What sense does it make to keep it besides trying to stay famous at the expense of the person who you just divorced? Same with engagement rings & other personal gifts: these were supposed to be symbols of commitment and now represent nothing after the divorce, yet you keep em just for the bling?
Blu out.
My reaction to this was an unequivocal WTF. Kobe didn't sign a prenup, sure, but is that really fair that Vanessa gets half of his sports empire? Where is the legal logic in this?
Fair enough, back in the day men really had no consequences for sleeping around and philandering. This is why now we have laws for paternity and abortion. In the 1800s, a woman who was divorced by her husband often had no education, or a way to make a living, so we devised a system that would prevent a good part of society from becoming homeless after their man left them.
However, this law hasn't changed at all to this day and has since turned into a way to screw men over. I'm not a men's rights activist and tend look down on those that carry that tone of discourse, but this is one area that I can agree on. Why is it that men must subsidize a woman's lifestyle as she lived with the main breadwinner? Shouldn't there be a cap, say a million dollars? Isn't that enough for a woman to survive on her own?
My lady friend's opinion was obviously different. The argument is as follows: marriage is a partnership and Kobe accomplished what he did because of his wife. She took care of the house and the kids while he played basketball. She is entitled to half because the "household" produced it. She also deserves the huge sum because Kobe cheated on her and the money is payment for the humiliation he wrought on her. She invested most of her most important years into Kobe and he just thew it all in the trash. Plus, it's his fault for not having a prenup.
I don't really buy this argument. Sure, Vanessa did most of the housework (oh wait, maids?) and raised the children, but to say she is responsible for even half of the success Kobe had as an athlete is absurd. This isn't really a logical argument so I can't really argue against it. How in the world does Vanessa's "work" in the marriage add up to 100 million?
And just because he cheated on her, that doesn't somehow magically entitle her anything special. Men cheat on women all the time, and vice versa. Sure, it sucks to be lead on for most of your adult life and to realize that the stud athlete you married is screwing young girls on the side, but can you really be surprised? Does that entitle you to damages?
A lot of people have joked that this is Kobe's fault for not getting a prenup. I feel like getting a prenup sets a bad tone for your marriage, because it essentially makes you admit that you don't trust your spouse 100%, which may be quite awkward. It also requires a steady & logical outlook with regards to marriage, which is not all too common when you're in love with someone enough to marry them. With that being said, judges have been known to toss out prenup agreements, so caveat emptor.
I'm not just ranting with regards to the Kobe situation. Many here are in the position or getting to the point where this will become an issue. It's almost impossible to structure your business, especially if you're simply running traffic, to protect yourself from divorce if you don't have a prenup. Make one wrong move with your spouse (or happen to marry a golddigger), and your internet marketing empire will go kaput. For those of you with SEO sites, you will probably have to sell your properties in order to fulfill the settlement.
Any thoughts?
PS: What's with women keeping the last names of their husband & engagement rings + other personal gifts. It strikes me kind of odd when women who have divorced famous men decided to keep the men's last name. The symbolism of you taking a man's last name means you are entering his family and becoming 'his'. What sense does it make to keep it besides trying to stay famous at the expense of the person who you just divorced? Same with engagement rings & other personal gifts: these were supposed to be symbols of commitment and now represent nothing after the divorce, yet you keep em just for the bling?
Blu out.
